Date: 08/08	7:00 PM
Views: 580

Tonight's Raw takes place on the road to a very interesting Summerslam. With Big E injured, how will The New Day continue? And how will Finn Balor and Seth Rollins one-up each other before their battle to become the first WWE Universal Champion? What does Charlotte have in store for her dethroner Sasha Banks, and is Roman Reigns all the way in the hunt for the US Championship?

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Raw opens with a recap of last week's Raw, as well as Brock Lesnar's appearance on Smackdown. Then they promise an upcoming retrospective of Brock Lesnar and Randy Orton's histories together.

Enzo and Cass hit the scene. "My name is Enzo Amore, and I am a certified G and a bona fide stud, and you can't teach that. And this right here, this is Big Cass, and he's seven foot tall, and you can't teach that. Bada boom, realest guys in the room, how you doin'? So, uh, last week I came out here on Monday Night Raw, pretty much a G. Came out here and I was spitting some game to the WWE Women's Champion Sasha Banks, how you doin'?"

"And she was loving it."

"No question she was loving it. She was smitten, she was smitten."

"She was smitten like a kitten."

"I don't have no crystal ball, but I had that in the bag. The chemistry in the ring was like a science fair."

"Your bunson burner was on fire."

"I was ready to erupt."

"You were hitting dinger after dinger."

"And Jon Bon Jericho wants to come out here with his golden glove, I got Sasha Banks in the palm of my hand, and he comes out and hits me with a Codebreaker. The only code you broke was the man code when you wore a scarf without a shirt, how you doin'? The sight of that makes me want to baby burp. And if you don't know what that means, it means I throw up in my mouth a little. We're some Anaheim Angels on the stairway to heaven, you're on the highway to Hell. Come on out here, you Axel Rose wannabe, welcome to the jungle, you're goin' down."

Jericho comes out. "The only reason you're still here is because every time you open your big mouth, you have that big guy watching your back. You're like Spike and Chester, those two dogs. 'How you doin', Cass? How you doin'?' But at least you have someone watching your back. And now I have someone watching mine."

Kevin Owens comes out.

Chris: "Now, you see, Owens and I had a lot of problems when he came to WWE, but I talked to Jimmen Marvenlooter, and he gave me some advice, and now he and I are like brothers. Come hell or high water, he has my back. No matter what, he always has my back. You have my back, right? Kevin?"

Kevin: "I thought it was a rhetorical question. Yeah, I got your back."

Cass: "He's got your back, you've got his? Like Bert and Ernie? Scrubbing each other's back in the very same tub?"

Chris: "Only a stupid idiot would find that funny!"

Cass: "Do something about it."

Kevin: "I actually used to like you. Because like you, I used to have a dead weight of a best friend holding me back. But the difference is, I got rid of mine, and you took yours to Raw. So now I have to listen to that every week. So now I don't like you. And you know what, Big Cass? I don't care that you're seven foot tall, I'm gonna hurt you. And you know what? If it's not me that's gonna hurt you, Chris Jericho's gonna hurt you."

Chris: "Yeah. If he doesn't want to, I will. You dig?"

Cass: "Then let's go right now."

Chris: "Whoa, whoa, calm down. I wasn't talking to you."

Cass: "You were looking directly at me."

Chris: "No I wasn't. I was talking to you, hip hop hobbit. You know what you're gonna get? It."

Enzo: "I don't know what it is, but when I find out, I'm gonna shove it down your throat!"

Match One: Enzo Amore vs. Chris Jericho

Back on air, lockup, Jericho with a side headlock, Enzo whips out, Jericho with a shoulder tackle, another, Enzo with a dropkick, pair of arm drags, armbar, jockeying for position, tussle in the corner, Enzo with a pair of delayed hurricanranas, Owens distracts, Jericho with an elbow in the corner, leg choke, Owens with a punch, Jericho with a snap suplex for one, punch in the corner, foot choke, Enzo with punches, Jericho with a dropkick for two, misses a punch, Enzo with punches, Jericho with a knee, tosses Enzo to the apron, Enzo skins the cat, tosses Jericho to the floor, baseball slide, commercial.

Back on air, Jericho is choking Enzo in the corner, whip, Enzo with a boot, springboard DDT from the top rope, punches in the ropes, whip, reversed, Enzo with a crossbody, mounted punches, shoulder tackle, boot to the gut, knee lift, running forearm for two, Jericho with a boot in the corner, misses a clotheslien, Enzo goes for a hurricanrana, reversed into the Walls of Jericho, Enzo slowly makes it to the ropes, Jericho thinks Enzo tapped, Enzo with an elbow, goes up top, crossbody for two, Jericho bails, Enzo with a suicide dive, rolls Jericho into the ring, Owens grabs a leg, Big Cass walks over, Jericho with a Codebreaker, Cass with a Big Boot.

Winner by DQ: Jericho

Cass grabs a mic. "Kevin Owens, you wanna stick your nose in our business? You two vs. me and Enzo in our back yard at Summerslam."

Off-mic, they accept.

Cass: "At Summerslam, we will prove that there's only one word to describe you, and I'm gonna spell it out for you! S-A-W-F-T, SAWFT!"

Backstage, Mick Foley says on the phone to Stephanie that he's invited Daniel Bryan to figure out this Lesnar/Orton situation. Sasha walks in, and Mick tells Steph he has to go. Sasha says she wants to make it a handicap match so she can keep her eyes on Dana Brooke. Mick proposes a match against Dana tonight, if Sasha wins, Dana is banned, if she loses, she gets her handicap match. Sasha accepts.

They show a WWE-themed commercial for Ben Hur, making them look like the same product.

Match Two: Braun Strowman vs. Jorel Nelson

Byron Saxton interviews Jorel backstage, he can't answer. Jorel gets an entrance, walking in equally gobsmacked.

Nelson starts to leave, Braun knocks him off the apron, rolls him back in the ring, clothesline, reverse chokeslamfor three.

Winner: Braun Strowman

Puff Daddy gives Mick Foley tickets to a concert in Columbus. The New Day walk in, eating Booty-Os. Woods congratulates Combs on being the curator for WWE 2K17. He has some cereal, asks about Big E's injury, they affirm that he's down, walk off to give Big E a call.

Match Three: Titus O'Neil vs. Darren Young

Young opens with punches, whip, reversed, Titus with a knee, Young to the apron, Titus knocks him to the floor, presses him to the apron, chop, rolls Young into the ring, slaps him from behind, clothesline, punches in the corner, Young with a slap, elbow, discus elbow, second rope crossbody, caught, Titus goes for a powerslam, Young reverses into a rollup with tights for three.

Winner: Darren Young

Seth Rollins hits the ring. "Ladies and gentlemen, the new era in WWE is upon us, and I must admit, it's been quite the learning experience. Even I, the great Seth Rollins, have learned a thing or two. Case in point: Finn Balor. I mean, I have followed Finn Balor's career for years, and I thought I knew everything there was to know about him. I thought he was just a second-rate ripoff of me. The Jared Leto to my Heath Ledger if you will. But last week, I was forced to re-evaluate. (clip of last week) So he's athletic, we knew that. He's agile, we knew that. He's a potent striker. He kicked me in the head, a normal man would still be laying on this mat, but I am no normal man. If being simply the best was an Olympic sport, I would have more gold medals than Michael Phelps. But we already know about Seth Rollins, how about Finn Balor? Did you know Finn Balor isn't even his real name? He made his name under some other name, Finn Balor is just some mythology thing. Finn means famous warrior, Balor means demon king. Demon king, can you believe that? That would be like me calling myself Rambo Apocalypse. Seth Rambo Apocalypse Rollins. So we know who Finn Balor wants to be, let's talk about who he is. The more I know about him, the less I like him. He is one of the most disrespectful men I've ever met. He came in this ring and talked to me like just another guy. Then he told me he was going to beat me. You've been here, you've won two matches, granted those two men were no joke, but they're no Seth Rollins. He said I had my chance handed to me, like I didn't come back in record time from this knee injury. He is disrespectful, he is arrogant, ignorant. I am none of those things. I am not arrogant, I know my place in the WWE, right at the top. I am not ignorant because I don't need mythology, I don't need to surround myself with stories and fantasy. I am the myth. In 200 years, parents will be telling stories about me. They will be talking about how I slayed the beast, because that's what I did. About how I crushed the face that runs the place, because that's what I did. About how I conquered the Roman Empire, because that's what I did. And about how I rode into Summerslam and became the first WWE Universal Champion."

Match Four: Sheamus vs. Cesaro

Sheamus presses Cesaro to the corner, punches, snapmare, side headlock, Cesaro to his feet, whips out, Sheamus with a shoulder tackle, Cesaro with a dropkick, clothesline over the top rope, suicide dive, Sheamus with a running knee back in the ring, punches, punch in the corner, suplex, blocked, Cesaro reverses into a delayed vertical, European uppercuts in the corner, whip, Sheamus presses him to the apron, Cesaro responds with a forearm, goes up top, Sheamus crotches him couple of punches, fireman's carry senton, commercial.

Back on air, Sheamus goes up top, Battering Ram for two, chinlock, European uppercuts, Cesaro with a few of his own, whip, reversed, Cesaro to the apron, Sheamus with a boot, Ten Beats of the Bowery, Cesaro with elbows, goes up top, crossbody for two, Sheamus goes for White Noise, reversed into a rollup, into a Cesaro Swing, blocked, Sheamus with a rollup for two, Cesaro goes for the Neutralizer, blocked, Brogue Kick, blocked, Cesaro with a rollup for two, Sheamus with an Irish Curse for two, White Noise for two, goes up top, Cesaro crotches him with a European uppercut, trading punches, Sheamus with a boot, Cesaro with a dropkick, Sheamus lands on the floor, Cesaro follows and hits a running European upercut, rolls Sheamus into the ring, Uppercut train, Sheamus uses the ref as a shield, thumb to the eye, rollup, the ref is busy catching his bearings, Cesaro with a rollup for three.

Winner: Cesaro

They show a video package for Orton/Lesnar, highlighting when they first met in OVW, then saying they were at their closest when they first debuted. Orton says Lesnar pissed him off when he left because he "didn't like people". Lesnar and Heyman brush off any connection they might have, that they were never close, that Orton isn't on his level.

The Dudley Boyz make their way to the ring, the commentators reveal there was an altercation with Neville and they challenged him to find a partner.

Match Five: The Dudley Boyz vs. Neville and Sin Cara

Sin Cara is dressed in full Sin Cara Negro getup. Which is fitting, given.

Sin Cara and Bubba start off, Bubba with a big boot, mounted punches, D-Von in, punch, another, a third, punch to the gut in the corner, Bubba in, elbows, punches, punch to Neville, heads out to the floor, Sin Cara with a suicide dive, rolls Bubba back into the ring, punch, whip, reversed, Sin Cara with a springboard reverse DDT, kick, slides to the floor to block a D-Von cheap shot, Bubba knocks him off the apron, rolls him back in the ring, D-Von in, wish bone, elbow drop for two, whip to the corner, Sin Cara sells hard, whip to the opposite corner, chop, whip, misses an avalanche, Neville in, series of kicks, running heel kick, avalanche, goes up top, missile dropkick, kip up, charges, D-Von with an elbow, Bubba tries to run interference, D-Von goes for a clothesline, Neville ducks and D-Von hits Bubba, Neville with a dropkick, suicide dive to Bubba, Sin Cara takes out D-Von, Neville hits the Red Arrow for three.

Winners: Neville and Sin Cara

Rusev and Lana come out to re-enact their wedding. Speaking of which, I'd like to give a shout-out to my brother and now-sister Chris and Steph and congratulations on their marriage over the weekend. It was a beautiful ceremony.

Lana: "Rusev is my prince, and I am his princess. When you marry a princess, you are supposed to give her the wedding of her dreams, and that is what this man did. Unfortunately, none of you could attend, because it was VIP only."

"Hey! You respect my wife!"

"But today is your lucky day, you will get to watch as we re-enact our special day."

"Isn't she beautiful? And she is all mine, my beautiful princess, Lana!"

"Well, we're about to give you the best gift that you will ever get in your entire life. And that is for all of you to re-experience our wedding day. It is a chance for all of you to see what it means to have true love."

They show photos from the ceremony.

Rusev: "We don't have any more pictures, I know you want more, more, more, but this is all we have for you!"

"We rented a private beach on the Pacific Ocean, and unlike all of you who can't even afford to rent a one-bedroom apartment, let alone a beach."

"This is why I work so hard, why I fight so hard."

"We were able to afford the custom diamonds, custom dress."

"Look at these cakes! They cost more than any of you make in a month!"

"And of course, all the media outlets like TMZ covered my special day. We wrote our own vows. All of you, take out your phones, take out your camera phones, and witness the life-changing moment when we shared our life-changing vows. Are you ready? Get up and take pictures of us, right now! Get up, get up!"

"I know why all of you are booing, because you are just jealous, American pigs!"

Roman Reigns hits the scene again. "Take it easy, relax. Like I said, relax, I'm not out here to fight you, I'm not out here to ruin this. I was in the back watching the video, and the first thing I noticed was, I don't even have a best man. So I figured I needed to step up and be your best man, I'd come out here, pour a couple of drinks, and give you guys a toast, what do you say?"

Rusev: "I don't need your stupid toast!"

Reigns: "Well if you don't want my toast, how about you accept my challenge? For the United States Championship at Summerslam."

Rusev: "I say no to that."

Reigns: "Well, if you're going to say no to my challenge, you're going to say yes to my toast. I came all the way out here. Let me pour a drink, got to have a little drinky-drink with a toast."

Rusev: "That isn't yours!"

Reigns: "You don't mind. Let me toast. I've never seen a marriage between a Bulgarian sasquatch and a mail-order bride. Now come on, we got off on the wrong foot. I came out here to make a toast, I'm kind of disappointed, I came out here expecting to have a good time, I'm kind of disappointed in you. Just like Lana was disappointed on your wedding night."

Rusev attacks Reigns, clubs away at him, guides Lana out of the ring, Reigns tackles him into Lana, who lands in the cake.

Backstage, Rusev and Lana are freaking out to Mick Foley, saying he needs to do something about it. Mick Foley tells him he'll get the chance to work out his frustrations defending his title against Roman Reigns at Summerslam.

Match Six: WWE Women's Champion Sasha Banks vs. Dana Brooke (non-title, Handicap Match vs. Banned from Ringside)

Dana attacks Sasha from behind, Sasha with a slap, ducks a clothesline, hits a hip toss, running double knees for two, toss to the corner, Dana tosses her to the corner, tosses her head into the mat a few times, straightjacket hold, boot to the gut, Sasha with a kick, tosses her way out, ducks a clothesline, hits a trio of clotheslines, catches a boot, toss down, Dana with a clothesline for two, cover again for two, a third cover for two, slaps, Sasha takes down Dana, shot to Charlotte, Dana charges her in the corner, Sasha ducks, sets her up sideways, double foot stomp for three.

Winner: Sasha Banks

Another Ben-Hur themed vignette shows 1-2-3 Kid beating Razor Ramon.

In a package, Finn Balor appears sitting on a demonic altar. He says that Seth doesn't know his history, then delves into the Irish mythology. He says that he draws on these myths when he feels his body isn't enough. At the end, he transforms into the Demon.

Gallows and Anderson appear backstage dressed as doctors in a doctor's office. They talk about the epidemic of Ringpostitis. They say that Big E came through emergency surgery, it was nuts, and several other testicular puns, then they vow to take another sample from Kofi Kingston.

Match Seven: Kofi Kingston vs. Luke Gallows

Jockeying for position, Gallows with a clothesline, Kofi with a dropkick, drops Luke to the floor, suicide dive, rolls Like into the ring, goes up top, Anderson goes for a leg, Woods grabs him, toss to the post reversed, Gallows clubs a distracted Kofi from behind, inverted TKO for three.

Winner: Luke Gallows

They go to pull Kofi's nutsack into the ring post, Woods scares them off with a chair.

In an "earlier today", Goldust runs into a Scooby Doo mascot, Truth comes out of the van, he's mad that Goldust blew him off for the mascot at Christmas, they all hang out together.

Mick Foley comes out. "You know, that wedding was fresh. When I was in the WWE, I lived by the idea of an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, an ear for an ear. But in retrospect, that philosophy seems kind of outdated and barbaric. In that respect, please welcome Smackdown General Manager Daniel Bryan."

Bryan hits the ring. "Guys, as much as it pains me to say it, hasn't Mick Foley been doing an excellent job running Monday Night Raw?"

"Thank you, Daniel. As long as we're throwing compliment grenades across enemy lines, you're not only doing an excellent job running Smackdown, the work that you and Mauro Renallo have been doing on the Cruiserweight Classic is excellent. Taking great matches and making them even better."

"Thank you. And with the reactions these fans are giving me, as good as Smackdown Live has been, tomorrow--"

"I can understand why you would want to plug your show, but I invited you here to apologize, Brock Lesnar coming to your show and invading was completely uncalled for and should never have happened."

"You don't need to apologize, Smackdown did kind of fire the first shot. The way Randy Orton came out of nowhere and RKOed Brock Lesnar was uncalled for."

"Don't condescend me like that. If you really meant any of this, you wouldn't be talking smack on Talking Smack about our championship. I've got the clip right here."

They show a clip of Daniel Bryan saying that Smackdown doesn't want to just create titles out of nowhere like Raw did.

"That was taken out of context! I totally thought you should've created an interspecies title or something--"

Rusev comes out. "Raw doesn't need a champion, they already have a champion, I am champion, next time Smackdown bug comes in, I crush him for greatest GM in history, Mick Foley!"

Bryan: "Are you trying to suck up to Mick Foley to get out of your match at Summerslam? That's kind of pathetic."

Cesaro comes out. "Rusev, I know you're having a very bad night. But I have an idea to make it much worse. Mick Foley, you said that I could have a title match if I beat Sheamus."

Mick: "To be fair, Sheamus did nearly have you for a second."

Cesaro: "I thought you were a man of your word."

Mick: "I am a man of my word."

Bryan: "For what it's worth, I think you're being totally underutilized on Raw."

Mick: "Daniel, don't make it worse. Look, Roman Reigns will get his shot at Summerslam, but you can have your shot tonight. Right here in Anaheim, California!"

Main Event: US Championship: Rusev (c) vs. Cesaro

The bell rings a few seconds before the clock strikes 11. Rusev demands to be introduced first again.

Cesaro opens with an uppercut train, Cesaro Swing blocked, Rusev to the floor, Cesaro with a suicide cannonball, back in the ring, top rope crossbody for two, Neutralizer, blocked, Rusev with a catapult, Cesaro to the top rope, leaps, Rusev ducks, tosses Cesaro into the ring post, then into the opposite ring post, then into the adjacent ring post, boot to the gut, punches in the corner, foot choke, ref forces a break, Rusev tosses Cesaro's arm into the ring post, punch, another toss, shoulder tackles in the corner, whip, Cesaro sells hard, Rusev with punches, hip toss, elbow drop for two, armbar, hip toss, stomp to the head, kimura lock, Cesaro counters into a body slam, Cesaro Swing, blocked, Cesaro hits a double foot stomp for two, European uppercut in the corner, hits a succession more, tornado DDT for two, Rusev with a kick to the gut, roundhouse kick for two, stomp to the back, Accolade, Cesaro blocks Rusev from locking his arms, electric chair, trading punches and European uppercuts, Cesaro wins, whip, reversed, Cesaro with a spinning corkscrew European uppercut, Cesaro Swing, Sharpshooter, Sheamus hits the ring, Cesaro knocks him off the top rope, Rusev with a superkick for two, Accolade, blocked, Cesaro tosses Rusev into Sheamus where he also hits the ref, Neutralizer, there's no ref, he pulls the ref over and covers for two, Rusev with a thumb to the eye, Sheamus with a mule kick through the ropes, Rusev with a superkick for three.

Winner and STILL US Champion: Rusev

Roman Reigns hits Rusev with a spear as he's walking away. Dean Ambrose is somewhere out there getting hooked up for the Stone Cold podcast as Rusev lies prone in the middle of the floor and Raw goes off the air.