Date: 12/12	7:00 PM
Views: 453

Tonight's Raw is the last before the second Roadblock event of the year. Only this one is called Roadblock: End of the Line. Tonight, we find out whether The New Day will go into Roadblock as the longest-reigning tag team champions in WWE history as they defend against Cesaro and Sheamus and Gallows and Anderson in a triple threat tag match and also an incredibly confusing sentence for anyone who doesn't know tag team names. Also, other stuff!

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Raw opens with the usual graphic.

The New Day enter.

E: "Tonight, we join the immortals!"

Kofi: "Tonight, we've got a chance to break a record that has stood for over 25 years."

Woods: "Tonight, we have a chance to propel not only ourselves but also anyone who has ever worn a New Day t-shirt. To propel anyone who has ever chanted, 'New Day rocks!' We have a chance to propel everyone who has ever supported us, whether they are still with us today or whether they have passed."

Kofi: "Tonight is for you, grandma."

Woods: "But the last thing that stands in our way is one more triple threat tag team match. But honestly, guys, what does that even mean? People across the world have referred to The New Day as a triple threat."

Kofi: "It's true. I mean, you look at Xavier, the brains the wisdom. You look at me, I'm very smooth. That's the finesse, not to mention I am very handsome."

E: "And me, I'm the big, meaty third leg."

Woods: "And in a triple threat tag, we have not one, but two tag teams that are vying to become your WWE World Tag Team Champions!"

Kofi: "So let's bring out our opponents, so that The New Day can take their place in tag team history, baby!"

E: "But why? Because..."

And they let the crowd finish.

Match One: WWE Tag Team Championships: The New Day (c) vs. Gallows and Anderson vs. Sheamus and Cesaro

There's a title reign celebration set up backstage. Please don't have this all be a fake-out. Don't take us this far then leave us at the door.

Kofi and Cesaro start off, lockup, Kofi with a side headlock, Cesaro whips out, misses a few strikes, Kofi with a hurricanrana, Cesaro blocks by cartwheeling, Kofi with a top rope crossbody for two, Cesaro with a suplex for one, Sheamus in, Cesaro with a whip, Sheamus whips Cesaro into Kofi for a European uppercut, Sheamus with a running European uppercut of his own, top rope double axe handle for two, punch, body slam, blocked, Kofi with a dropkick, Sheamus hits the corner, E in, shoulder tackle, Kofi with a leapfrog kick, E with a tackle, Kofi in, running roundhouse kick for one, Sheamus with a punch, knee lift, suples, blocked with a knee, Kofi breaks with a jaw breaker, Anderson tags in on Sheamus, Rainmaker, Gallows in, clothesline, Anderson with a boot, Gallows with a strike, commercial.

Back on, Anderson has Kofi in a chinlock, Kofi to his feet, goes for a tag, elbows his way out of the hold, Anderson with a punch to the back, whip, spinning elbow for two, Gallows in, headbutt, big boot, Anderson in, Hart Attack-style running elbow for two before Big E breaks the count, Gallows with a boot to E, inverted 3D, Gallows in, punch to the gut, suplex, reversed into a shove, Gallows blasts Cesaro, Kofi with a springboard missile dropkick, Sheamus tags in on Kofi, boots Gallows, shoulder to Kofi, tosses Gallows to the apron, punch to Kofi, Ten Beats of the Bowery to Gallows, fireman's carry senton, blocked, Sheamus punches the interfering Anderson and body slams Gallows for two as E breaks the count, Irish Curse to E, big boot to Sheamus, Boot of Doom for two after Cesaro breaks the count, Cesaro in, clothesline, boot to Gallows, springboard European uppercut to Anderson, 619, inner thigh attack to E, European uppercut to Kofi, double foot stomp to Gallows, top rope crossbody to Anderson for two, Cesaro Swing, into a Sharpshooter, Sheamus blocks Woods from interfering, E tosses Sheamus over the top rope, slam to Cesaro reversed into a hurricanrana, Atomic Drop/Brogue Kick combo to Anderson, Kofi hits Sheamus with Trouble in Paradise to Sheamus, Big E holds Cesaro back as Kofi covers for three!

Winners and STILL Tag Team Champions: The New Day

I have no idea if and when Kofi tagged in, but FUCK IT, NEW DAY RETAIN! NEW DAY RETAIN!

A teaser airs for "Lana and Rusev: Behind Closed Doors".

Backstage, partygoers, who include Stephanie McMahon and Mick Foley, await the arrival of The New Day. They arrive, Stephanie offers a toast to the longest-reigning tag champs of all time before Xavier Woods accidentally gets champagne in her eyes. She flips the bowl of Booty-Os, frightening Bayley, because of course she's there.

They replay the Sami Zayn/Mick Foley altercation from last week. Also on a commercial for Smackdown, they announce that James Ellsworth will get his tag title shot.

Kevin Owens confronts Stephanie McMahon and proposes they teach The New Day a lesson.

Match Two: Curtis Axel vs. Braun Strowman

Axel opens with punches, Strowman tosses him across the ring, clothesline, punch to the chest, Torture Rack, Axel punches his way out, boot from the corner, another, top rope, missile dropkick blocked by a clothesline, Strowman with a wheelbarrow suplex for three.

Winner: Braun Strowman

Byron: "Umm... Braun, do you have a response--"

"Shut your mouth! The first thing you do is congratulate me on my victory, then you ask questions!"

"My apologies, congratulations on your victory. How do you feel about Sami Zayn's tweet demanding a match with you, 'or else'?"

"From up here, he (Axel) looks like Sami Zayn. He can't hang with me, and neither can anyone else!"

Backstage, Sami Zayn confronts Mick Foley and demands the match again. Mick says he can't. Zayn says he can, but he won't, but no one needs to save him, just like no one had to save Mick. Mick admits he sometimes wishes someone had stopped him, and says that Braun is playing a completely different game. He offers him any match, a championship match, but not Braun. Sami threatens to go to Smackdown. Mick offers to call Daniel Bryan to work out a trade, Zayn walks off.

Match Three: Ariya Daivari vs. Lince Dorado

Handshake, Dorado handstands toward Daivari, Daivari with a side headlock, Dorado punches his way out, Daivari with a shoulder tackle, hammerlock, Dorado escapes with an arm drag, another arm drag, heel kick, shoulder tackle, springboard crossbody, blocks a number of strikes, hits a chop, misses a dropkick in the corner, Daivari with a clothesline, Jack Gallagher comes out with a microphone. OH MY GOD HE'S GOING TO TALK!

"Now, as an extraordinary gentleman, I'm going to announce my intention of interfering in this match. Now, while I don't normally condone such unsportsmanlike behaviour, you, Mr. Daivari, are a scoundrel! So all that dictates that tonight, Mr. Daivari, I am here to give you a thorough thrashing."

Daivari and Gallagher brawl on the floor.

Winner by DQ: Daivari

They fight back in the ring, Gallagher headbutts him to the floor. THAT WAS THE GREATEST THING EVER!

Sponsored by the movie Sing, they show Stone Cold singing to Vince McMahon in 2001.

Seth Rollins hits the ring for the Rollins Report. "Philadelphia, welcome to the Rollins Report! Now, last week I stood in this ring and I said it loud and clear, but I figured you good people, you needed to hear it again, so I'm going to say it again, and again, and again, until it goes through his thick skull, I want HHH! I laid it out last week, my path to redemption goes through Kevin Owens and the Universal Title, but I can't isolate Kevin Owens until I get rid of his... maybe best friend? Chris Jericho. But I have the chance at Roadblock to get rid of Chris Jericho, but I need to ask the question tonight, is it Seth Rollins vs. Chris Jericho or Seth Rollins vs. Chris Jericho with Kevin Owens? Only my guest tonight has the answer tonight, so introducing my guest tonight, Kevin Owens."

Owens hits the scene, then pulls out a chair and sits on the ramp.

Seth: "Kev, what are you doing, I've got this stool set up in the ring for you, why are you all the way out there, can you not go to the ring without Chris Jericho holding your hand?"

"I'm sitting in a stool, that's all you can hope for. I really don't care about your Rollins Report, I'm just out here to make an announcement."

"But we all have to know, how is your friendship with Chris Jericho? I mean, it has to be strained, right?"

"I was talking to Stephanie McMahon--"

"Come on, we have to know. I mean, I know it's a little fuzzy, I Pedigreed you last week, but then you disobeyed the wishes of your best friend and cost him a shot at the US Title."

"Look, all you have to know is that Chris Jericho has my back, and I have his in his match on Sunday. Now as far as my announcement, and I really hope you don't interrupt me again--"

"Or what?"

"Or I'll break your face. After what The New Day pulled, Stephanie McMahon decided to put them in another tag team title match tonight, and that's against Kevin Owens and Chris Jericho."

Jericho comes out with the list. "Kevin, I need to ask you a question right now: Are you crazy? Hmm? Do you really think after what you did last week, when you cost me the United States Championship against Roman Reigns, and the week before that when you told me to shut up, do you really think I would agree to be your tag team partner tonight or ever again?"

Owens: "Look, maybe I should've listened to you last week, but you can't keep thinking about the past. Tonight, we not only have the chance to become tag team champions, we could ruin The New Day's chances of breaking the record. Think about it. You can think about it all you want, but Stephanie made the match, it's going to happen, so you can either stew or we can win the tag team titles tonight."

Seth: "Look, it sounds like Kevin is trying to tell you what to do. He's so bent on this reunion between Bon Jovi and Meatloaf, he wants to manage it."

Chris: "You stay out of it!"

Seth: "Or what? You going to come down here, Sparklecrotch? You going to put me on the list? Or what?"

Chris: "You know what happens? You know what happens when people talk to me like that? You wanna know what happens when people make requests like that? You wanna know what happens? Yo-- I'll put you on the list alright. The disabled list."

Jericho starts toward the ring, Owens stops to talk to him, they decide to hit the ring together, Owens grabs a chair, Rollins scares him off with the stool, Jericho attacks him from behind, JeriKO beat Rollins down on the floor, toss him into the barricade, punch, Reigns hits the ring and starts fighting them off, but they beat him down, until Rollins starts rallying, Reigns with a big boot to Owens, Rollins with an avalanche to Jericho, whips him into a Roman Reigns clothesline, Pedigree to Jericho blocked as Owens pulls Jericho out of the ring.

Charly Caruso asks Rich Swann about what happened after his match at 205 Live last week, and about defending the Cruiserweight Championship in a triple threat. He says he can do it no matter what. Brian Kendrick walks in and says he'd be champion if not for Perkins. Swann calls him out on trying to drive a wedge between him and Perkins. Perkins walks in and calls Kendrick out.

Match Four: TJ Perkins vs. Brian Kendrick

Kendrick offers a handshake, Perkins denies it, Kendrick opens with a boot, blocked, lockup, Kendrick with an armbar, elbow, Perkins whips his way out, Kendrick with a shoulder tackle, chinlock, knee, armbar, wrenches the fingers, Perkins flips his way out, kick, Kendrick with a chinlock, blocked, Perkins goes for a kneebar, blocked, Kendrick with a kick, whip, Perkins floats over, kick, fireman's carry, Kendrick gets to the ropes, Perkins slides through, tosses Kendrick to the floor, Wrecking Ball Dropkick, commercial.

Back on air, Kendrick has Perkins in a dragon sleeper, transitions to a chinlock, Perkins elbows his way out, Kendrick tries to roll him into the Captain's Hook, blocked, Kendrick with a punch, rolls Perkins through, he lands on his feet, spin kick, Kendrick goes for a punch, blocked, Kendrick with punches, inverted atomic drop, clothesline, another, kick to the leg, tosses Kendrick to the corner, tree of woe, running dropkick, goes up top, dropkick to the back of the head for two, crossface chicken wing, blocked, Kendrick with a back suplex for two, Captain's Hook, blocked, Perkins locks in the kneebar, Kendrick quickly makes it to the ropes, tosses Perkins to the post, Sliced Bread #2 for three.

Winner: Brian Kendrick

Backstage, Seth and Roman are hanging out, Mick Foley reminds them that the two of them are actually tag team champions together. They both say they're only focused on Sunday, Mick says it's not about the future or the past, it's about tonight. The tag title match is now a triple threat.

They show a video package for Sasha vs. Charlotte.

Match Five: Bayley vs. Alicia Fox

Earlier tonight, Alicia Fox destroyed one of Bayley's bears, Fatal Attraction style, and said Bayley's win was a fluke. She vows to win for Cedric.

Bayley with a belly to back takedown, side headlock, snapmare, chinlock, Fox whips her way out, misses a kick, Bayley hits an elbow for two, spins around on her back, Fox goes for a boot, reversed into a German, reversed into an elbow, Fox with a scissor kick for two, choke in the ropes, triangle choke, Bayley rolls her up for two, Fox with a suplex, into a Northern Lights suplex for two, punch, forearm, Bayley busts out a Bayley to Belly for three.

Winner: Bayley

After a commercial, Lana is in the ring. "And now, America, I ask you to stand up and put your hand on your heart and welcome your one and only true American hero. He is my husband, which, as Enzo Amore found out last week, he is the only man who can have me. He is the Bulgarian brute, Rusev!"

Rusev hits the ring. "Ever since I got here, I have destroyed all your American heroes one by one. But last week, last week was different. Last week, I took out an American trash! Week after week, Enzo Amore comes out here running his mouth about how he's Certified G? And not until last week, I realized what the G stands for. It's for garbage! And after I took the human garbage out in the hallway and I close the hotel room behind me, we and Lana... did our business. You know what I'm saying? Me and Lana took care of business. And would you like to see what I'm talking about? Yes? Yes? Then let's see it! I should warn you, though, the footage you're going to see tonight, it's a little bit edgy. It's a little bit out there."

"We should warn you, the footage is a little bit sensitive. So, children, close your eyes. Are you ready to see what we do behind closed doors? Are you ready to see what I do behind closed doors?"

They just show a replay of the segment last week.

Lana: "This footage, it is just so good. It makes me so happy. It warms my heart. Wait, did all of you actually think that Rusev and I were going to show you what we do behind closed doors?"

"You think we're that stupid?"

"All of you are so gullible. Just like that stupid Enzo Amore. He actually thought that he had a shot with me, when every week, I come out here and say that Rusev is the only man that can have me. He is so delusional and pathetic. Just like every one of you."

"But my beautiful wife, she came up with a plan. A plan to corner that little mouse, right there in the corner, and when the time was right, bam! I crushed that little mouse! You need to understand that Lana is my wife, and if anyone disrespects her, I will crush you!"

"C-R-U-S-H-E-D, CRUSHED!"

Big Cass comes out. "Rusev, last week you gave Enzo the beating of a lifetime. And right now, he's at home recovering, he's got ice all over his body. Enzo, he likes to run his mouth, but at least he's got the balls to back it up. And last week, you caught him with his pants down. But as for tonight, this isn't a hotel room, my pants are on, and me? I'm not Enzo."

Rusev tries to cut Cass off as he enters the ring, Cass quickly rebounds, Rusev double-legs him, it doesn't take, Rusev tackles him to the floor, they keep brawling, Rusev eventually retreats.

Backstage, Kevin Owens is venting to Chris Jericho about Seth and Roman being added to the match. He says it's always going to be them against the world, Jericho says focus on tonight.

They show a promo for Emmalina. It says "premiering soon" again. GODDAMMIT!

Match Six: Sami Zayn vs. Jinder Mahal

Lockup, Mahal presses Zayn to the corner, break, misses a clothesline, Zayn with a clothesline, toss to the corner, chop, toss to the adjacent corner, chop, punches, whip, reversed, Zayn with a dropkick, Mahal with a knee, toss to the apron, Zayn with a shoulder tackle, flips into the ring, clothesline, mounted punches, Mahal presses him across the top rope, cover for two, boot to the back, punches, whip, elbow, dropkick, cover for two, knee lifts to the face, knee drop, chinlock, adds in a keylock, knee, body slam, blocked, Zayn goes for a German, blocked with an elbow, Zayn with a clothesline, exploder suplex to the corner, Helluva Kick for three.

Winner: Sami Zayn

Mick Foley hits the ring with a clipboard. Raw goes to commercial.

After a commercial, Mick speaks. "Well I've... just gotten off the phone with Daniel Bryan. And although it took a lot of negotiation, it was determined that we will be trading you to Smackdown Live for a talent of equal value. All you have to do is sign on the line. This is what you want, right?"

"Well, Mick, that all depends on one thing: Are you going to give me the match with Braun Strowman or not?"

"Sami, you act like you need this match with Braun Strowman, but you and I both know you don't want this match with Braun Strowman. The answer is no."

"Then that's all I need to know."

"But before you sign on the dotted line, wouldn't you at least like to know who this talent is? The talent we've assessed to be of equal value? Daniel Bryan has agreed to trade you, straight up, for Eva Marie."

"Eva Marie, Mick? I'm worth a hundred Eva Maries, a thousand Eva Maries, and what blows my mind is that you don't get me! Because you used to be me! How many times did anyone tell you that you couldn't do it? How many times did they tell you no? I'm sick of paying for your mistakes!"

"What do you want?"

"I want Braun Strowman!"

"How bad do you want Braun?"

"Give! Me! Braun! Strowman!"

"I want you to remember this moment! I want you to remember how angry you feel in this moment! Because you're going to need it this Sunday night when you go one on one with Braun Strowman! There was never a trade. I wouldn't trade you for anything. I believe in you, I like you. But I needed to know if you could tap into that dark part of your soul to come up with what it took! Braun Strowman said you wouldn't last two minutes. I'm giving you ten minutes. Ten minutes to prove to me, to Stephanie McMahon, to the WWE Universe why you belong."

Main Event: Raw Tag Team Championships: The New Day (c) vs. JeriKO vs. The Shield

Please. Please don't do it. I know they probably won't, because everyone else in the match is already scheduled for Roadblock in a singles match, but still. Would they be this dickish? Yeah, they absolutely would.

Woods and Rollins start off, lockup, Rollins with a hammerlock, twists an arm, Woods reverses into a hammerlock, shoulder tackle, trip for a zero-count, Rollins with a trip for one, Woods misses two kicks but hits a European uppercut instead, Rollins with a slingblade for two, Reigns in, whip, misses a double clothesline, E in, lockup, Reigns with a side headlock, E whips his way out, then dumps Reigns to the floor, Big E spear, reversed into a knee, Reigns with a clothesline, Jericho tags in on Reigns, running big boot on E, stomps, stands on him, Owens tags in, kick to the gut, Jericho with a punch to the back, Owens with punches, boot, cover for two, stomp to the hand, elbow to the back of the shoulder, shoulder tackles in the corner, punch to the gut, toss to the corner, Jericho in, slap, another, a third, E with a punch, slaps, Jericho tosses him to the corner, big boot, stomps, goes up top, spinning elbow for two, running boot, Owens in, running senton for two, wrenches the neck, fireman's carry, break, mutual clothesline, Woods in, alternating punches and chops, running clothesline, kick to the gut, dropkick to the back in the ropes for two, goes up top, Jericho distracts, Owens with a punch, goes up top, superplex, blocked, Jericho joins in for a double team superplex, Rollins blocks by punching Jericho, Jericho beats him down, Reigns and E come in for a six-person tower of doom, commercial.

Back on air, Owens has Woods in a chinlock. Somersault leg drop, chinlock, Woods to his feet, Owens knocks him down, punches Reigns, Woods knocks him down, double tag to their own partners, E with a pair of belly to bellies, then a third, running splash, Rollins tags in on E as he's running the ropes, then tosses him to the floor after he's finished the move, Rollins tosses Jericho to the floor, suicide dive, rolls Rollins back into the ring, tosses Big E to the floor, high knee to Jericho, Reigns tags in, Codebreaker reversed into a powerbomb for two, calls for a Superman Punch, hits it to Owens, Jericho with a rollup for two, Walls of Jericho, blocked with punches, Woods tags in on Jericho, swinging kick to Reigns, goes up top, elbow drop for two, drags Reigns up, trading punches, Woods with a spinning elbow, Rollins tags in, Reigns aids in a wheelbarrow knee to the jaw, Owens with a superkick to Reigns, Rollins with a rollup superkick to Owens, goes up top, Jericho knocks him off, Owens clears Rollins, Lionsault to Woods for two, chops, Woods goes off the ropes, gets caught into a Walls of Jericho, Woods slowly rolls through, rollup for two, Jericho misses a tackle in the corner, Jericho presses him to the corner, Woods goes for a tornado DDT, Owens slides in the ring, Pop-Up Codebreaker for two as Rollins breaks the count by pushing Owens, who's trying to block him, into the pin cover, Jericho and Owens start to bicker, Rollins shoves Jericho into Owens, Pedigree to Jericho, Big E pulls Rollins out of the ring while Woods limply covers Jericho for three.

Winners and STILL Tag Team Champions: The New Day

Dear god what a whirlwind. I felt things. Your winners and one hour away from tying the record for longest-ever tag team champions in WWE, THE NEW DAY!

After the match, Owens yells at Jericho for getting bent out of shape over Rollins clearly pushing Owens. Jericho reiterates that they're done while Reigns readies himself for a spear. Jericho acknowledges that Owens is right, then leaves the ring. Owens turns directly into a spear before Reigns holds both championships above his head and Raw goes off the air.

Both championships other than the Tag Team Championships, that is, because, as is now indisputable fact, NEW! DAY ROCKS! NEW! DAY ROCKS! GET THE BOOTY-OS!