The Great American Bash Live Recap

We'll be doing live results throughout the show so click F5 or refresh as often as you like! Great American Bash is live from San Jose, California tonight and the bar is buzzing with the possibility of Rey Mysterio Jr. returning early, possibly in the Cruiserweight Open, given the PPV is taking place so close relatively speaking to his hometown of San Diego. Let's get this Bash started!

* MVP {C} v. Matt Hardy (United States Championship)

Hardy comes out first to a huge San Jose pop. MVP comes out and JBL says that he'll be BALLIN' tonight. Lock-ups and arm drags early. MVP rolls out for a breather and Hardy mocks him with a jump shot. Another rolling arm drag sends MVP out to the floor and Hardy does a flying crossbody over the ropes. MVP gets the momentum when they get back in, hip toss, near fall. MVP pulls Hardy off the ropes hard and slams his head into the canvas for another near fall. Hardy gets faceplanted into the mat but surprises MVP with a clothesline. Hardy sells not being able to come off the top rope due to his inner ear balance being off. MVP goes top rope with him for a superplex and a near fall. Hardy gets a comeback and a bulldog off the second rope for a near fall. Hardy signals for a Twist of Fate, MVP tries to counter into a playmaker, Hardy double counters to the TOF and gets 2.9. Schoolboy roll nearly gets three. MVP hits a nasty running boot on Hardy in the corner, sets up the playmaker, hooks both legs and covers for three. WINNER AND STILL US CHAMPION: MVP.

Dusty Rhodes cuts a promo backstage. He says the Bullrope match is all about cowbell ringin', and he's got JUST THE HEAD TO RING IT ON. He talks about a lockerroom full of WWE stars who have respect, and Orton is the only one he needs to teach it to. He's gonna crack backs, livers quiver, and if you don't dig this mess you're at the wrong address. Rhods talks about cows lookin' pretty, a bull up on the hill, then gives a big MOOOOOOOOOOOOO and he says that old bull is ready!

* Cruiserweight Open (Chavo Guerrero - Champion)

Jimmy Wang Yang is the first to come out. Shannon Moore is second, Funaki comes out third. Jamie Noble fourth, and the champion Chavo Guerrero is last. First man to get the pinfall or submission can win the belt. For some reason Hornswaggle goes flying through the ring as the match gets underway. Hornswaggle comes back in at the very end of the match after an electric chair and jumps off the top rope with a frogsplash to pin Jamie Noble! WINNER AND NEW CRUISERWEIGHT CHAMPION: HORNSWAGGLE~! All of the cruiserweights chase him but he runs under the ring and escapes up the ramp with the belt. Promo for Triple H's return follows, as well as a promo package for Bobby Lashley challenging Cena and all his accomplishments along the way.

* Sandman v. Carlito (Singapore Cane on a Pole Match)

A nothing match for most of the duration - San Jose was so quiet you could hear a pin drop. Carlito misses with a back handspring elbow and the crowd finally gets excited when Sandman goes up to retrieve the cane. He gets one swing with it and misses, Carlito hits a backcracker, and that's all she wrote. WINNER: CARLITO. Afterwards Randy Orton cuts a promo backstage and promises that Rhodes won't have much to remember fondly when the night is over.

* Candice Michelle {C} v. Melina (Women's Championship)

Melina is the first out and does her splits, even though she's wearing long trunks now and it's just not the same. Michelle comes out and twirls around with the belt in her right hand, a flash of gold and not unlike Trish Stratus of old... well at least in looks. This was a surprisingly good match. Melina kept coming on strong, Michelle worked an arm over the rope and concentrated most of her offense on said arm, lots of near falls including a flying crossbody by Michelle, and after a jawbreaker (which J.R. says is the first time Melina had her mouth shut in an hour) she hits her new finisher the Candy Wrapper (standing bulldog) for the three count. WINNER AND STILL CHAMPION: CANDICE MICHELLE. Matt gives Jeff Hardy advice backstage, and reminds him to stay focused. Michelle is walking backstage and sets her title down to grab a bottle of water, and says "hi guys" seductively to Matt and Jeff before pouring the water all over her body, causing Matt to take a long big swig of his own. Both Matt and Jeff make "oh my" faces as porno music plays and Candice turns around to pour the water all over her back and down her rear before flinging her hair all the way around her head. Matt looks so excited he's about to faint. Ron Simmons walks in on the show and says the horniest DAMN ever.

* Umaga {C} v. Jeff Hardy (Intercontinental Championship)

Hardy out first to a huge ovation. Umaga comes out and J.R. describes his weight advantage over Hardy as near 400 pounds, and Lawler says if you kick Umaga in the heart you'll break your toe. Hardy gets a beatdown for the first five or six minutes, attempts a suplex, and Umaga comes down on top of him for 2. Umaga starts jumping off the second rope to squash him despite repeated warnings from the ref, and on the third try Jeff blocks straight to the crotch. Umaga comes back with a Black Hole Slambut Jeff kicks out at the last minute. Umaga goes for a diving headbutt and Hardy gets out of the way, getting a huge pop from the crowd. Jeff starts chopping down the tree and finally hits a mule kick and a DDT then pulls the ropes down when Umaga charges and dumps him outside. Baseball slide through the ropes knocks Umaga into the apron and an over the top crossbody wipes out Umaga on the floor. Ref starts a 10 count for both men. Umaga gets back in at just about 9. Hardy with a sunset flip on Umaga, Umaga goes for a sitout and misses, Hardy hits a dropkick for a near fall. Umaga throws him into the corner and starts hitting closed fists, then backs up for the running butt bomb. Jeff ducks at the last second and comes off the top rope with a twist of fate and gets 2.99999. The whole bar erupts at this near fall. Cousin Paul: "What does it take!!" Lawler: "He's hit him with everything but the kitchen sink." Umaga misses Jeff and hits the turnbuckle head first. Jeff hits the swanton and crawls over for the cover for 2.999999999999999999 and still can't get the pin. Umaga comes back with the butt bomb in the corner and the thumb to the throat and holds his arms to the mat for three. WINNER AND STILL IC CHAMPION: UMAGA. Great match - a shame Jeff Hardy didn't win but he didn't look weak in the loss - this built up both men a great deal. Already a strong contender for match of the night. A promo package for Cena the equivalent of Lashley's earlier follows.

* John Morrison {C} v. CM Punk (ECW Championship)

Johnny Nitro, now known as John Morrison, comes out to the ring first with his new music. Video package shows Morrison running down CM Punk's name on Tuesday night. Punk's response was to come after him, which lead to Morrison clonking him with the mic and hitting a corkscrew to the canvas. Punk hits a monkey flip early that Tazz and Styles dub a gorilla flip based on how far Morrison flew. John rolls outside for a breather, Punk follows him out for a clothesline and starts to drag him back in the ring, Morrison trips him on the steel steps and Punk goes down hard. Morrison stays on offense from there, even getting "ground 'n pound" according to Styles, and Punk gets a few hope spots here and there. Morrison nearly finishes the match with a roll-up but the ref sees him using the ropes for leverage. Punk hits an enzuguiri for a near fall. Punk hits a running knee to the corner and goes for a bulldog but Morrison rolls out and tries to escape with his title belt. Punk knocks him down on the ramp and throws him back in. He goes for a springboard crossbody but Morrison gets a knee up to block and covers him for three. WINNER AND STILL ECW CHAMPION: JOHN MORRISON. Plug for Cobra Starship's "Church of Hot Addiction" the theme song for tonight's PPV follows courtesy of J.R. and King. Promo package for the bullrope match follows, starting with Cody and Dustin presenting their dad the HOF award this year in Detroit, then Orton being disrespectful backstage with a slap to the face, and Dusty cutting a promo in the ring leading to the challenge match where Dusty picks the terms and Orton accepts.

* Randy Orton v. Dusty Rhodes (Texas Bullrope Match)

Orton comes out first and poses. Dusty comes out to a big pop with the bullrope and cowbell in hand. The ref straps Dusty in and Orton goes out to the floor to stall and get heat. He finally gets in and gets strapped to the rope and it's a comedy match early with Rhodes having his way with Orton, whipping him like a government mule inside the ring, pulling him into the post when Orton goes outside, yanking him off his feet on the ramp, and eschewing the cowbell to Orton's head in favor of his own bionic elbow. Orton makes a comeback and starts stomping on Dusty's bandaged left knee, getting huge heat including a "Randy SUCKS" chant. Orton starts choking him out with the bullrope, Dusty makes a comeback, misses with an elbow drop and Orton clocks him hard with the cowbell for the pin. Over a lot faster than most of us expected. WINNER: RANDY ORTON. Lawler: "When your bell gets rung, the lights are out." Orton goes for a beatdown afterwards but Cody Rhodes hits the ring and grabs the cowbell, daring Orton to try something. Orton leaves to a huge chorus of boos, setting up a big match between RKO and Cody later down the road.

* The Great Khali {C} v. Batista v. Edge (WHC with Triple Threat Rules)

Video package promoting the match to start. Kane comes out to huge pyros, Batista comes out to a huge reaction, and Khali ... well he's just huge. This match is getting underway at about 10:00 EST, 9:00 Central so this PPV could end anywhere from 20 to 30 minutes early. Khali dominates early, eventually chokeslamming Batista then Kane. Everybody ends up on the outside. Khali rips apart the ECW announce table. Kane attempts a chokeslam and is blocked. Batista attempts a Demon Bomb and is blocked. The two team up, drive Khali's head into the steps, then give him a double chokeslam through the announce table. Khali's down, so Batista and Kane brawl inside of the ring. Batista with a slam for a near fall. Kane and Batista on the top rope, Kane knocks him off with a headbutt, hits the flying clothesline and signals for a chokeslam. Khali tries to come in behind him and gets the chokeslam instead but Batista breaks up the three count. Kane and Batista brawl on the outside. Batista drives him into the steel post, hangs Khali's neck off the ropes, but Khali knocks him down with ease when he gets back in. Khali goes for a judo chop, Dave hits the Batista Bomb, this time Kane breaks up the three. Kane spears the post, Batista goes for the bomb, Kane counters, Batista gets chokeslammed, Batista kicks out at 2.9! Kane goes out for a steel chair. Kane comes in with it but Dave hits the Batista Bomb on him and goes for the cover but Khali pulls him off and outside the ring, then throws him into the steel steps. Khali steps over the top rope, wraps his hands around Kane's neck for the tree slam, and covers him for three. WINNER AND STILL WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION: THE GREAT KHALI. A promo for "The Most Powerful Families in Wrestling" on PPV follows, along with another Triple H "Bow Down to the King" video package promoting his return at SummerSlam. Who will his opponent be - who knows!

Time for the main event! Before we can get started King Booker comes out with a mic. Booker is again complaining that Triple H didn't get his "cease and desist" order and "the only King is I, King Booker" then goes over to confront "Jerome Lawler" again. Booker says his "act of regicide will be dealt with post haste" and that the only way for Lawler to make amends is to get in the ring with him and lay a crown at Booker's feet. Sharmell screams at him. "Did you not hear your King! Get in this ring now and relinquish your crown." Lawler takes off the headset and gets up slowly as a pop for him starts to build up. "King Booker, if you want my crown, come over here and get it!" Booker says he's not surprised, and declared this "an act of treason." Booker leads Sharmell out of the ring and seems to be leaving. Booker gets a chorus of boos as he walks up the ramp and out of the building, and Lawler retakes his seat at the announce table.

* John Cena {C} v. Bobby Lashley (WWE Championship)

Power moves, power moves and more power moves. Lashley overpowers Cena with the collar and elbow tie-up at the start, and it's back and forth from there on. Late in the match Lashley misses a splash into the corner and Cena his a modified slam twice in a row before signaling for the 5 Knuckle Shuffle. He connects but Lashley gets up to his feet. Cena goes for the FU, Lashley counters into a powerslam and gets a 2 count. Lashley spears Cena in the corner and clotheslines him in the other, then picks him up for a torture rack shoulder breaker, then walks away to pose instead of making the pin. This mistake comes back to bite Lashley as Cena hits the FU, but he's slow to get up. He crawls over for the pin and drapes an arm over but Lashley kicks out at 2. Lashley drills Cena in the head and sets up for a huge spear, waiting for Cena to stand up, but Cena trips him running in and locks on the STFU. Lashley is square in the middle of the ring with nowhere to go. Cena lays all his weight on Lashley's back and Lashley crawls towards the ropes, and just barely manages to get the rope break. Lashley hits a spear but Cena kicks out at 2.9! Lashley shoves Cena into the corner, sets him on the top rope, Cena gets out of it and FU's him off the top, then covers for three. WINNER AND STILL WWE CHAMPION: JOHN CENA.

Cena celebrates and then turns to look at Lashley, who stands there waiting to offer him a handshake. He pauses for a minute and finally takes it with a nod of respect, and that's how The Great American Bash ends. Good night everyone!