| Date: 01/18 | 11:35 PM |
| Views: 1,210 | |
Our thanks to Joe Laracuente from The Doorstop Nation, who sent us the following review of the 1/17 show!
Back once again Bruno calls it a schoolplex. I assume this is their horrible PPV called Beach Blast. Craig DeGeorge: "There are reporters from all over the world covering this event! There all here for UWF Beach Blast!" Craig also hypes a match of Terry Gordy vs. Johnny Ace. Meanwhile the Black Hearts leg drop Jim from the top 1, 2, 3.
WINNERS: BLACK HEARTS.
Luna chokes Fire Cat out with a chain for no reason. Commercial
Power Twins vs. Masked Confusion (B. Brain Blair and Jim Brunzell)
Power Twins cut a horrible promo. Power Twins 2 on 1 on Brain Blair then they throw him out of the ring. At this point I think Bruno just said "Oh shit!" Commercial for Nutrisystem. Yes, they still hyping this PPV event too. Now I ask who in the hell ordered this? Why? This is God-awful. We're back with a double clothesline on Blair. Bruno: "Every match is a main event!" Commercial again. Back again and this match is still horrible! Double back drop on Blair. Brunzell tags in but you know the drill - the ref doesn't see it. The Blair goes under the ring, gets out masks, they both put their masks on so you can't tell which one is which. Blair sunset flips one of the Power Twins for 1, 2, 3.
WINNERS: MASKED CONFUSION.
Show #2: "The only wrestling organization that doesn't make a mockery of wrestling!" Suuuuure. YES - Herb and Bruno are doing the commentary.
Bob Orton vs. Kevin Benjamin
Bruno:"Like Bob Orton or not, once he hits the schoolplex from the top forget about it!" Commercial - already? It's a genital herpes commercial. Didn't Christian say he had genital herpes once? We're back and Herb Abrams says that John Tolos hired a bounty hunter to get rid of Brain Blair. John should've hired the Iron Sheik for a HUMBLING! I think Bruno said schoolplex 5 times in one minute! Agraphic on the screen says this was taped "November 10th, 1990." Bob Orton hits a schoolplex for the 1-2-3.
WINNER: BOB ORTON.
Commercial
Paul Orndorff vs Spitball Patterson
Paul Orndorff comes out to "U Can't Touch This!" Commercial - damn we just got back! Back from commercial again and the referee is yelling at Spitball. Someone in the crowd just shouted out BOR-ING! Orndorff cross body. Orndorff knees to the face. Orndorff kicks to the face. Orndorff drop kicks. Orndorff elbow from the top! Commercial! Then Orndroff hits a piledriver for the pinfall!
WINNER: Paul Orndorff.
Oh no, it's Dr. Death Steve Williams! Steve attacks Orndorff then Orndorff makes a comeback. Steve rams Orndorff into the post! Wait, Steve gets a chair! Herb Abrams is going crazy! Steve hits the referee three times but the referee no sells!!! Wait - what did I see just see? The referee NO SOLD THE CHAIR?!!!! YES THE REFEREE NO SOLD! THE REF NO SOLD!!!!!!!!!!! Orndorff then gets hit and then blades himself, selling it like he got shot! There's even a doctor to check on Paul to see if he's still living!! Then a grapic the screen says "October 1st, 1990." Orndorff is in the ring! Steve Williams enters. Steve looks at Paul then leaves the ring. Bruno: "Paul Orndorff is not like someone like Davey Meltzer!"
Back to the normal show which is November 1990. Captian Lou is joined with Steve Williams. Steve claims he doesn't like Orndorff. Then Herb is with Orndorff... Orndorff acts like he's just been shot. Okay let me get this straight - Paul got hit once and he's near death yet the ref got hit 3 times and he's fine. Hmmmmm. Orndorff then attempts to cut a promo and then he says he will never forget... we fade to black that's the show!
OH WAIT! The opening of the UWF shows once more!! YES!!!! Now it's the end of the show! LOL.
OVERALL: I really enjoyed the last 3 minutes of the show where the ref NO SOLD three chair shots! LOL, classic! Other than that, show #1 sucked bad... REALLY bad. It was horrible! I think you have to be drunk to think it was even remotely good. The Power Twins vs The Masked Confusion was bad... no it was terrible! Show #2 sucked too, but at least it was laughable. Both shows sucked but well I am kinda enjoying reviewing UWF because people always say there needs to be more wrestling on Doorstop Nation. Well I figure I'm tired of WWE and TNA so to do something different, UWF it is! Have a good one! I think I need a drink after watching this. I should've gone drinking before watching these shows!