| Date: 11/03 | 7:00 PM |
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The Episode #800 Three Hour Rawtastic Batista Bombastic Jerichoholic Atomic Rootin' Tootin' 21 Gun Salutin' WWE Raw Recap- YEEEEHAWWW!!!
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Tomorrow you get to Smackdown your vote, but tonight D-Generation X returns to lay the smackdown on Miz & Morrison, Batista defends the WWE World strap against Chris Jericho in a steel cage, and we start with... Randy Orton!
"Last week I gave Shane and Stephanie McMahon and ultimatim," says the former champion. "Either they fire Mike Adamle as General Manager, or I walk!" Orton informs us that the McMahons told him that there would be no announcement unti they came out and said so, Orton says that he will remain at ringside until they do.
Jeff Hardy & ECW Champion Matt Hardy vs. Montel Vontavious Porter & THE Brian Kendrick (w/ Ezekiel Jackson)
As the reuinited duo makes their way out, Michael Cole segues us into highlights of Jeff Hardy vs. Randy Orton from Episode #768 earlier this year, culminating in Hardy taking out Orton with a high-risk dive from the top of some scaffolding onto Orton, putting both men out. Porter comes out, we're reminded that MVP will receive a bonus if he wins a match, but he hasn't won a match in eleven weeks. Kendrick comes out, we're reminded that he is the only WWE superstar to switch brands twice back-to-back drafts.
We start with Jeff Hardy and MVP, MVP with a side headlock, that doesn't last long as Jeff takes to the offensive, whips MVP off the ropes, drops him with a double leg takedown and a pin, tags into Matt, double team fistdriver, Matt with a pin attempt. Matt tags Jeff back in, whips MVP into a corner, ducks down, Jeff launches himself off of Matt's back to fly into MVP, Jeff with a pin attempt. Jeff tries to kick MVP in the face, MVP moves out of the way, tags in Kendrick as Jeff eats the mat. Kendrick with a kick to the back of the head, pin attempt, and several more kicks to the back of the head, then mounts Jeff for some face punching, followed up by a baseball slide dropkick, pin attempt. Kendrick with a sleeper, then decides to just throw Kendrick to teh mat. Kendrick tries for Sliced Bread #2 (No, Michael Cole, it's now called THE KENDRICK!), but Jeff blocks it, nails him with a swinging neckbreaker, and tags in Matt, Kendrick makes a tag to MVP.
Matt takes it to MVP, goes for a bulldog off the corner, turns around and takes out Kendrick with a clothesline as well. Matt goes for a pin, Kendrick recovers and breaks it up. Matt pulls up MVP, MVP whips him into the ropes, both men take each other out with a clothesline. MVP makes a tag, but Jeff Hardy holds up the referee so he doesn't see the tag, and he actually forces Kendrick out! Matt Hardy takes out MVP with the Swanton Bomb as Ezekiel Jackson is on the apron and complaining.
WINNERS: Matt & Jeff Hardy. All night tonight we'll be recapping classic moments from WWE Raw's history. We're starting with Episode #1, with Bobby "the Brain" Heenan unable to get into the "sold out" arena, unable to get a ticket or a press pass, attempting to disguise himself to sneak in. At the end of the show, he gets clearance to go in. Sorry for the mix up, boss! We take a break and recap the worst mistake ever made in professional wresting, Episode #17 - The 1-2-3 Kid (Sean Waltman) defeats Razor Ramon (Scott Hall). We go back to ringside with Randy Orton waiting.
8-Man Over-the-Top Battle Royal for #1 Contender to the WWE Intercontinental Title
Before this match gets started (with all participants in the ring), the Glamarella - Santino Marella & Beth Phoenix - make their way to ringside. We ring the bell and within 30 seconds Jamie Noble is thrown over the top, but he holds the rope to hang on, didn't see who pitched him. Manu & Ted DiBiase, Jr. work over William Regal, Cody Rhodes takes on Noble, headscissoring him over the rope, but they land on the aprong togther, both men roll back in.
Snitsky is battling JTG , tries to throw him over, JTG hang on, Snitsky charges, JTG pulls down the rope, and DiBiase, Rhodes and Manu all come over to help dump him over... then DiBiase single-handedly dumps over Manu and Rhodes as well! As Santino Marella points out, "With friends-ah like-ah dat, who needs-ah an enemy?" Regal & Noble eliminate each other, brawl outside and up the ramp. DiBiase eliminates JTG, and we're down to Ted DiBiase, Jr. and Shad Gespard. Gespard with a clothesline on DiBiase, followed by a second, followed by a running powerslam - NO DiBiase wiggles out! Gespard charges with a big boot to the face, DiBiase ducks it, pulls down the ropes, Gespard is hung up! DiBiase with standing dropkick on Gespard to send him out of the ring.
WAIT! William Regal is back in, apparently Noble dragged him out of the ring under the ropes after Regal eliminated him, so Regal is still legal! He grabs a hand full of tights and throws DiBiase over the top!
WINNER: William Regal. We highlight Regal being pulled out of the ring, then Regal eliminating DiBiase. We then cut back to a garage area where we see a limousine pull up. Stephanie & Shane McMahon step out, Stephanie stops herself and tells Shane that he should go take care of things by himself. Shane asks if she's sure, says that he didn't really want to do this on the 800th anniversary show, but he'll take care of it. Off to break, wecome back to Episode #409, the announcement from Vince McMahon that WWF was purchasing WCW, only to find out that his own son Shane swerved him and purchased the company himself. What was meant to end the Monday Night Wars (and start a new feud within WWF) instead goes down as one of the biggest botched mergers of all-time... which may be how Vince wanted it after all.
Back on TV, Randy Orton is back in the ring, wanting an answer finally. Shane McMahon's music hits, and the Executive Vice President of World Wrestling Entertainment makes his way out. Remember when this kid was just a referee? :-)
Shane addresses Orton and says that he doesn't appreciate being called out by Orton the way he has. Orton cuts him off and says that if he was half the man Vince was, he would be taking care of WWE's top superstar. Shane cuts him back off and says that he isn't his father, and Orton should remember the position that he holds in the company.
Before we can get any further, WWE Raw GM Mike Adamle makes his way out. Adamle comes into the ring, stops Shane and says that before he goes any further, he has to clear his chest. Adamle says that when he took the position of WWE Raw GM, he wanted to be the first GM who didn't take a side or a position, or have an agenda. But last week when he slapped Randy Orton in the face, he became the very thing he didn't want to become. Therefore, effective immediately, Adamle officially resigns. Adamle shakes Shane's hand, thanks him and Stephanie for the opportunity, and walks off.
Randy Orton leans over the ropes and screams, "Hey, Adamle, don't you think you owe me an apology?!" Shane pulls Orton back and says, "I think you owe him an apology instead!" Orton starts to protest, but Shane says that he isn't done yet. Shane reveals to the fans, and to Orton, that he has known for the last several weeks that Orton's little shoulder injury has been cleared up, and he's free to resume his wrestling career, but hasn't informed anybody! Orton says he was going to get around to it, but was planning on waiting until closer to Survivor Series. Shane says that ain't going to fly, he's gonna have Orton wrestle TONIGHT! Orton says that he's not prepared, he didn't bring his ring gear, blah blah blah...
Shane says he's got all that taken care of, there's no more excuses, and tonight Orton's opponent will be... C. M. PUNK! Bling-bling! Shane-O Mac cashes in!
But, FUCK! Why let Adamle go?? UGH! Damnit no. We take a break, come back with some WWE promos that Senators Barack Obama and John McCain made earlier this year.
Vladimir Kozlov vs. Charlie Haas
Kozlov makes his WWE Raw debut, undefeated streak in-tact. Lawler notes, "This is one man that won't be voting tomorrow." Uh, WRONG! He's a naturalized American, King. Charlie Haas comes out this week as ... BRET "THE HITMAN" HAAS! Haas takes a mic, gets in Kozlov's face and gives him the classic "Shawn screwed Shawn" speech. Bell rings, Haas tries to kick Kozlov in the midsection, Kozlov no-sells, delivers his own kick to the chest, delivers a belly-to-belly suplex, delivers the battering ram, and pins Haas.
WINNER: Vladimir Kozlov. That's it, we're done. Kozlov gets a shot at Undertaker this Friday (okay, tomorrow night) at WWE Smackdown, and if he wins then he gets his title shot against Triple H at Survivor Series! Off to another break. We come back and recap Batista teaming with Shawn Michaels to defeat Chris Jericho and John "Bradshaw" Layfield in last week's main event.
We cut backstage with Todd Grisham for an interview with Dave Batista. Batista says it took him a long time to win the title back, but he's not ready to give it up. He says Jericho had every excuse as to why he didn't beat Batista at Cyber Sunday, but there will be no excuses in the cage tonight. We cut back to the announcer's table, which then segues into discussion about D-Generation X... of course bringing up one of the most famous D-X skits of all, Episode #257, D-Generation X invades WCW at a Monday Nitro show in Norfolk, VA. We then see Triple H and Shawn Michaels heading to the ring, blinged out in their D-X merchandise. That match is NEXT!
D-Generation X (WWE Champion "the Game" Triple H & "the Heart Break Kid" Shawn Michaels") vs. "the Shaman of Sexy" John Morrison & "the Chick Magnet" Mike "the Miz" Mizain
Now isn't that enough fucking titles for ya? Yeesh. :-P
D-Generation X gets to make their entrance first, which kind of surprises me, I'm sure they would have been last. Oh, wait, they have mics, they're gonna yammer on for about 10 minutes. Michael Cole reflects on his fond memories of D-X: "I couldn't stand these guys in the beginning... the wedgies, the wet willies... you know, they once beat me up with a shoe in the shower!" Lawler quips back, "Yes, I loved it! As long as it was happening to you!"
"It's been awhile since we've done this," says Triple H, "I forgot we had pyro!" He then asks the crowd if they're ready... but Michaels says he's not ready, he can't do this! "I was watching ECW last week, Miz and Morrison, they were mocking us. I think you'll want to see this." We then segue to the TitanTron, where Miz & Morrison mocked D-X including a beat-down on a couple of jobbers dressed in D-X gear.
Triple H and HBK look at each other in shock as Michaels says, tongue in cheek, "That could have been us! That could have been us!" They then cut through several comedy segments mocking each other's quirks - Triple H's big nose, Shawn Michaels' chaps. D-X decide to have their own fun mocking M&M, who mentioned that they were in high school when D-X was getting started. So they throw up a photo of their high school photos. Shawn Michaels says that Miz's photo, "... was taken right after he placed second in the Kentucky Derby! (No offense, to you, Lillian!)" WOAH! LMAO! Where did that come from! They said that Morrison looked like a guy you would see at many a interstate rest stop for years to come! They said that both of these guys looked like kids who got beat up regularly in high school. We finally get around to doing a proper D-Generation X promo.... "Leeettsss geeett reeeaaadddyyyy toooo SSSUUUUCCCKKKK IIIITTTTTT!!"
We finally get the introduction for Miz & Morrison... right into a commercial break. *sigh*
We come back from break, the match has already started, Morrison just got a pin attempt on Triple H, Trips is in a headlock, gets to his feet, Morrison puts him in a corner, whips him out, Triple H charges out and clotheslines Morrison, both men are already down and winded, both men make hot tags. Michaels with the flying forearm on Morrison, the kip up, the inverted atomic drop, the body slam. Michaels goes to the top turnbuckle and nails the patented top rope elbow drop, and goes right off to tune up the band! Morrison runs over and grabs Michaels' arm, Michaels punches him off the apron, turns around and Mizain takes his head off with a clothesline.
Mizain tags in Morrison, catapults Michaels into a elbow drop from Morrison, pin attempt, Morrison with a side headlock, Michaels gets to his feet, puts Morrison in the corner, chip, whips him out, Morrison reverses it and throws him in the corner hard, Michaels whips up to the top turnbuckle then falls back into the ring, Morrison covers for a two count. Morrison tags to Mizain, whips Michaels into a corner, charges and nails the running bronco buster clothesline. Mizain taunts Michaels to get up, mocks Triple H, bounces off the ropes and tries for the Million Dollar Kneelift, Michaels side steps it, backslide, two count, Mizain recovers and clotheslines Michaels, tags in Morrison. Morrison sets up for the Snapshot, Michaels wiggles out of it, goes to kick Morrison, who grabs the leg, thumbs Michaels in the eye, but Michaels retaliates with an Enziguri, tags in Triple H.
Triple H whips Morrison off the ropes, high knee to the jaw. Triple H with another whip, Morrison reverses it, ducks, Triple H with a face buster, sets up for a Pedigree, Mizain runs in, Triple H nails him with a spinebuster, turns around and Morrison nails Triple H with a spin kick off the middle rope. Morrison with a high knee lift of his own, and he does a kip-up to mock Michaels, immitates the Sweet Chin Music and then takes out Triple H with the superkick! Mizain tags in, both of them stand over Triple H, immitate the D-X crotch chop. Mizain picks up Triple H and tries for the Pedigree, but Triple H back drops him! Morrison runs in for a clothesline, Triple H ducks it, Michaels is on the apron, pulls down the rope and Morrison sails over the top!
Mizain gets to his feet, Michaels hits him with the superkick, Mizain staggers around, Triple H finishes him off with the Pedigree! 1-2-3 stick a fork in the chick magenet, his goose is cooked!
WINNERS: Triple H and Shawn Michaels. Not a bad match at all. We recap the highlights, then go back to the ring as Miz and Morrison pick themselves up off the floor. D-X pose in the ring, we then cut backstage as John "Bradshaw" Layfield is standing with Shane McMahon. Layfield says that he obviously didn't beat HBK enough last week. Shane asks him if he came in to gloat about that. Layfield says that he has a business proposition for McMahon, putting him in a position of power backstage. Shane says that he'll take his proposition to Stephanie, but for tonight he had an idea of putting Layfield in a high profile match tonight. JBL says it would be great if he was put into the main event steel cage match for the WWE World Heavyweight Championship. McMahon said he had a better match in mind - John "Bradshaw" Layfield vs. THE UNDERTAKER! JBL is less than enthused, but he swallows his pride and walks out, realizing that this may get him what he wants later.
8-on-8 Divas Tag Team Match
Okay I got sidetracked and missed the start of this match, but Mae Young apparently is on the side of the babyfaces, she takes up most of this three-minute match after getting tagged in, and eventually gets pinned by Beth Phoenix with a school girl after Young throws Katie Lea Burchill out of the ring. Santino Marella comes down and celebrates with her. All the babyface divas gather around Mae to make sure she's okay, she gets to her feet and the fans cheer.
The WWE Smackdown Rewind is Undertaker d. Chavo Guerrero in a Casket Match last Friday, Big Show attacks Undertaker in the middle of the match, but doesn't prevent Chavo's demise. Vickie Guerrero then promises Vladimir Kozlov a title shot against Triple H if he can defeat Undertaker this Friday.
Want some more Raw memories? Episode #456 was "Hollywood" Hulk Hogan being challenged by The Rock at WrestleMania XX.
"the Legend Killer" Randy Orton vs. WWE World Tag Team Champion C.M. Punk
As Punk makes his ring entrance, we go back two months to the WWE Unforgiven PPV where Punk and Kofi Kingston were ambushed by Priceless and Randy Orton, taking Punk out of the scramble match and unable to defend his title. Randy Orton enters next, apparently he found a clean pair of trunks, and some more fucking ink for his arms. Christ, enough with the fucking tattoos already! Orton doesn't take time to celebrate, he gets right in the ring, and we get a bell.
Both men cricle the ring a few times, Punk takes a few swipes and kicks, Orton rabs a leg, Punk with an enziguri, puts Orton in a corner, delivers a dozen knees to the ribs, whips Orton to the opposite corner, then back to the corner again, Orton charges out with a clohtesline to take Punk down. Orton kicks Punk in the ribs then drives him to the mat, raking his face with a kneepad before laying in the Orton Stomp, finished with a kneedrop over the throat, cover and a two count. Orton goes into a side headlock, almost choking Punk. Fans start chanting for Punk as he gets to his feet, elbows loose, Orton takes him down with a club to the back. Orton whips Punk into the corner, charges, Punk sidesteps it, Orton eats the buckle, Punk leaps off the ropes and nails Orton with a clothesline, then a spin kick, the paintbursh fists, the backfist and a high kick to the head. Punk whips Orton off the ropes and nails a spinning heel kick to the face, throws Orton in the corner, hits the high knee, tries for the bulldog and Orton shoves him off.
Orton sets up for the RKO as Punk gets back to his feet, holding his back. Ted DiBiase flies into the ring and pummels Punk! DQ!
WINNER: CM Punk, by disqualification. Randy Orton looks around as Manu and Cody Rhodes get on the apron, looks over at DiBiase punching away at Punk... THEN TAKES HIS HEAD OFF WITH THE PUNT TO THE HEAD! Orton is pissed that Priceless has interfered, turns around - Rhodes and Manu are STUNNED! Orton steps out of the ring and walks off, looking back to stare as the referees check on DiBiase, Rhodes and Manu looking down over him. We take a break, come back and Orton is confronted by Rhodes & Manu. Orton explains that he didn't appreciate DiBiase stepping into his business, and hopes that the kick sinks in and DiBiase learns a lesson. He challenges Orton & Manu to man-up and do something about it if they don't like it. The boys hang back, Orton tells them that they're smart and that perhaps they're learning something.
We go back to the office with Stephanie McMahon primming, a knock on the door and Mike Adamle walks in. Stephanie says that she felt Adamle's speech was short, concise and to the point. Adamle gets right to the point again - he says the whole reason he resigned is because Shane hired him and told him to take matters in his own hands, only to have Stephanie turn around and contradict both himself and Shane. "Motherhood has not done you any good, you're still a megalomaniac." Stephanie straightens up her posture and says, "Don't blame me for your inadequacies! I'm a McMahon, and it is my birthright to control this show!" She brushes off Adamle and wishes him the best of luck in his future endeavors. Shane comes in afterwards and says he has a major announcement for Survivor Series that he will make shortly. Stephanie demands to know what he's got planned, he tells her to not worry about it, he's got it all handled. This apparently isn't setting well with Mrs. Helmsley.
More Raw recaps? How about Undertaker vs. Jeff Hardy for the WWF Undisputed Championship, Episode #475? "Go ahead, kid, make yourself famous!" shouts Jim Ross.
Speaking of which... BOOMER SOONERS! It's Good 'Ol J.R. making his way to ringside! Lawler, Cole and Tazz greet him at ringside as Ross takes his seat for this next match...
John "Bradshaw" Layfield vs. The Undertaker
The limousine pulls up, Layfield steps out and doesn't look to be in the best of moods as he takes that long walk to the ring... just to hear...
DONG....
DONG....
DONG....
and the most electrifying ring entrance in al of WWE, the man from Parts Unknown, the man from Death Valley, the man who has been buried alive, the man who has been to hell and back more times than any other man, the Dead Man, the Undertaker!
Layfield is unafraid to lock up with Undertaker at the start, but finds himself in a headlock. He tries to shove Undertaker off the ropes, but Undertaker knocks him down with a shoulder block, throws Layfield into the corner, lays in some punches, and then walks the ropes for the big hammer! Undertaker bounces off the ropes, Layfield takes him down with a clothesline, headbutts him into the corner, then lays in several big punches and kicks until the referee drags him away. Layfield moves right back in, pulls up the Undertaker, punch to the head, another, Undertaker reels off the ropes and throws several of his own right hands. Undertaker whips Layfield into the buckle hard, catches him out of the buckle, sets him up on his shoulders and delivers the Snake Eyes, legdrop, cover and a two count.
Undertaker signals he's ready for the chokelsam, waits for JBL to get up... WHAM! JBL goes down to the mat, Undertaker drags the thumb across his neck, ready to finish him. Undertaker picks up Layfield for the Last Ride, Layfield wiggles off, bounces off the ropes and tries for the Clothseline from Hell, but both men knock heads! Undertaker falls to his back, Layfield falls out of the ring. Referee starts a standing ten-count... 1... 2... 3... 4... JBL gets to his feet... 5... 6... he sees Undertaker sit up! Layfield backs away, he's had enough! 7... 8... 9... 10!
WINNER: The Undertaker, by countout. Layfield starts to backpedal up the rope, but runs right into Shawn Michaels, who grabs Layfield by the tights and throws him into the ring! Undertaker snatches up Layfield and plants him in the middle of the ring with the Tombstone Piledriver! Undertaker stands up and then shoots a dirty look at Shawn Michaels, Michaels retreats to the back, Undertaker walks off.
Back in the offices, Chris Jericho is waiting as Shane McMahon enters. Jericho says that he wanted to talk to Shane about his big announcement for Survivor Series, he has a feeling it has something to do with the WWE World Heavyweight Championship. Shane says that he is correct, the WWE World Champion - whether it be Jericho or Batista, will be defending the title at Survivor Series against John Cena. Jericho says that he's agreeable to this, "Karma has a way of righting itself, doesn't it, Shane?" he says as he walks off into a commercial break.
More Raw memories? Epsidoe #304 was "Stone Cold" Steve Austin giving Vince McMahon and "the Corporate Champion" the Rock a beer bath!
Speaking of nonsense, we have Kung Funaki warming up in the ring when Hornswaggle shows up! Hornswaggle immitates the Karate Kid's Flying Krane, then they start dancing. From underneath the ring, The Boogeyman shows up! He corners the two in fear, then starts strutting around the ring, Funaki and Hornswaggle join in. HOLY FUCK then here come a cast of characters including Goldust, Jim Duggan, Jesse & Festus Dalton, Dusty Rhodes, Sgt. Slaughter and ECW GM Teddy Long, all getting in and dancing! And, what the hell, Lillian Garcia, Michael Cole and Jerry Lawler join the party. The music is cut short, we break to the top of the ramp... it's Ron Simmons! ...
DAMN!
And the party rolls on! How about another Raw memory? The most bittersweet of them all - Episode #775, the retirement of "the Nature Boy" Ric Flair. Then there was the wedding of Edge and Lita, interrupted by Kane, who chokeslams the minister.
Kane & Mark Henry (w/ Tony Atlas) vs. Rey Mysterio, Jr. & WWE World Tag Team Champion Kofi Kingston
Well, this was probably going be Rematch #2079^10 between Kane/Henry and Mysterio/Bourne, but Bourne had the misfourtune of tearing a leg muscle from the bone on ECW last week, so Kingston gets to step in. We start the match with Kane kicking Mysterio in the chest, clothsline in the corner, whip out, Mysterio with a boot up, bouncing off the ropes, walking into a side slam from Kane, no cover, tag to Henry. Henry picks up Mysterio in a Gorilla Press Slam, but Mysterio lands on his feet fro the drop, kicks Henry a few times in the leg, bounces off the ropes and Henry kicks him in the face. Henry tries for a SENTON~! and Mysterio rolls out, tags to Kingston. Kingston flies in with a forearm from the top turnbuckle, tries a few kicks and an Ensiguri, but Henry grabs the leg and throws Kingston into a corner, watching him ping-point to the opposite corner.
But that doesn't stop Kingston, he continues to bounce all over the place, putting Henry in the corner and hitting a kneelift. He tries to whip Henry out, Henry stops it, tries to reverse the whip into the corner, Kingston floats over the top turnbuckle, tries to slingshot back in, but Henry catches his cross-body block. Mysterio gets in and tries to dropkick into Kingston to knock him onto Henry for a pin attempt, but after two tries, Kane steps in and kicks Mysterio in the head. Henry finishes off Kingston with the World's Strongest Slam.
WINNERS: Kane & Mark Henry. They're not done with Mysterio yet, however, as Kane picks up Mysterio and LAWN DART! Mysterio is slung face-first through the ropes and to the floor. Kane steps out and picks up Mysterio... wait, what is this? THE GREAT KHALI? Shit, what's he want? This isn't the Kiss Cam segment... PUNJABI CHOP ON KANE! Kane goes down! Khali steps on the apron, Henry charges, chop to the throat on Henry! Henry staggers back, headbutt by Khali sends Henry into the ropes! Mysterio gets in the ring, looks at Khali, Khali gives him a nod... 6-1-9! Henry staggers back up again, Kane finishes Henry with another Punjabi Chop to the head! THE FANS GO NUTS! Khali is actually getting cheered?!?
Wow, sometimes YOU JUST NEVER KNOW! One more commercial break before we go into the main event. Weeellll... okay, we have to play another John Cena comeback segment!
After that bullshit, we go back to the office. Shane: "Where ya been, sis?" Steph: "Around." Shane asks Steph how she liked his announcement, she says she loved it, but wished she was kept in the loop about it. Shane says he only wish Vince was around to see it, Steph agrees, and feels that he'd be very proud for how they're running Raw.
WWE World Heavyweight Championship - Steel Cage Match:
champion "the Animal" Dave Batista vs. Chris Jericho
We see the cage being lowered around the ring as we take another commercial break. Lillian Garcia welcomes us back by explaining the rules of the Steel Cage match. I hope we have it memorized by now, this is only the 4th f'n one in three months! Jericho is introduced first, and for the third time in as many months, he coldly looks up and down the cage. Damn, high definition really brings out the features in some people... like, for example, I can observe that Jericho has four ear piercings in each lobe. The champion is now here, though, Dave Batista with a brief intro after the pyro, he goes right to the cage and slams the door shut! Senior referee Mike Chiota keeps the men separated as he explains the rules, Batista ignores him and scales to the top of the cage to acknowledge the fans. Chiota takes the title from him and raises it above his head, signifying that this is the main event match for the title.
Bell rings, our opponents stare each other down from the corners. Jericho rushes forward for a tie-up, Batista shoves him off. Jericho charges again, Batista shoves him into the corner, lays in several shoulders. Batista whips him out, and Jericho dashes for the corner, leaps over the buckle and tries to scale out of the cage for a quick win! Batista drags him back in, puts him on his shoulders and plants Jericho into the mat with a power slam. Batista bounces off the ropes and takes Jericho down again with a clothesline, goes for a pin, gets a two count.
Batista with a headbutt on Jericho in the corner, turns him around, lays in punches and kicks then chokes him with the boot, no disqualification from the referee! Batista whips Jericho off the ropes, ducks down, Jericho with a boot to the face, bounces off the ropes and charges, Jericho side steps him and throws him face-first into the side of the cage! Fans chanting for Batista as he whips Jericho into the cage again face-first. Batista pulls him up by the hair, face-first into the cage for a third time as we take a commercial.
Back to live action, Jericho is flipping over Batista into the Boston Crab, he has it locked in the middle of the ring! Jericho calls for the door to be opened, the outside referee opens it, Batista rolls to his shoulder, grabs Jericho's leg and turns him out of the hold, kicks him off... RIGHT OUT OF THE OPEN DOOR! Jericho gets hung up in the ropes, OH NO! It's Jericho vs. Punk again! Batista scrambles over and prevents Jericho from getting out of the door any further, but Jericho is clawing at the steps to break free. Batista has the trunks now, pulls him back in, flips him over, punches him in the head. Batista's knee gives out and he slips, Jericho grabs the cage door and slams it into his knee! Jericho gets to his feet and slams it again, then wraps the knee over the bottom rope and wrenches it, pulls Batista out and nails an elbow drop onto the knee.
Batista gets to his feet, Jericho kicks the knee, but Batista fires back with a punch. Another kick by Jericho, another punch by Batista, one more kick by Jericho and Batista snatches him up and hits a side slam, covers, 1... 2.. kickout. Batista gets to his feet, whps Jericho into the corner, clotheslien, Batista whips Jericho off the ropes, ducks down, Jericho kicks him in the face, bounces off the ropes, Batista snatches him up and goes for the slam, but Batista's leg gives out again! Jericho goes for a quick pin, hooks the leg, two count. Jericho lets Batista get to his feet, he runs up for the Codebreaker, but Batista grabs him mid-move, holds him and slams him into the side of the cage!
Both men take a breather, Jericho gets to his feet, Batista gets to his feet and charges, Jericho side steps it and Batista hits the cage head-first. Another breather, Jericho scales to the top of the cage, gets over and starts to descend, Batista gets to his feet , opens the cage door and catches Jericho as he drops down! Batista drags him back in, whips Jericho ff the ropes and nails a Spinebuster! Batista tries for the Batista Bomb, but Jericho grabs the cages and scrambles up. Batista scales up the ropes to chase him, they battle, Batista knocks him down, but Jericho bounces the ropes, Batista falls and racks himself on the top rope!
Both men are down again, Jericho gets to his feet, climbs up the ropes, climbs up the cage, he's over the top, but Batista is right back up there, grab the tights and pulls him back over, sets up for a Batista Bomb from the top turnbuckle, Jericho is hanging on to the top of the cage for dear life, then pulls off a hook from the cables, and nails Batista in the head several times until Batista breaks, slumping down in the corner. Jericho scales back over the top, scales down the outside, Jericho catches him in a chokehold through the cage with one hand! Grabs Jericho by the hair with the other, Jericho kicks Batista in the knees through the cage, Batista falls to the mat, Jericho falls to the floor!
WINNER: AND NEW WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION, CHRIS JERICHO! I predicted it last week on the AngryMarks Thursday Night Podcast, Batista would not hold this title for long, and I was right, Jericho comes up big with a great main event! We recap Jericho finding the hook and nailing Batista in the head with it, Batista trying to hang on. We cut to see a bloodied Batista slumped in the ring, leaning on the cage as Jericho takes the belt and walks up the ramp, hands raised in victory!