| Date: 11/17 | 8:00 PM |
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The WWE Raw Recap - Southern Fried Rasslin' Edition
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Fresh off a hot European tourn, WWE returns tonight to Atlanta, GA, straight into the heart of TNA country! Tonight Stephanie McMahon has called an all-hands meeting, every WWE star will be at ringside! We will also see Shawn Michaels team up with Rey Mysterio to go head-to-head against John Morrison and Mike "the Miz" Mizain. Tonight's main even will see CM Punk, who is currently packing 1/2 of the WWE World Tag Team titles, getting his revenge against "the Legend Killer" Randy Orton for his vicious attack two months ago which cost Punk his WWE World Heavyweight Championship. Sounds like another hot night in Cat-lanta! (Sorry to you SEC fans, basketball season is now upon us, you know when Kentucky shows up in the ATL that somebody's getting clawed! RWOR!)
Stephanie takes the stage at the start of the show, all the starts in the ring. She says that her office has been flooded with questions from stars about the future of WWE Raw, and she's opening the floor for questions. Randy Orton steps up and asks why Cena gets to have a title shot at Survivor Series this Sunday. Stephanie defends that Shane set that match up without her input, but to more directly answer the question, Cena lost his title to an injury, and has a right to win it back. Orton turns around to the rest of his co-workers and says, "Fine, fine, but just to let everybody else know, I'm next!"
Cody Rhodes steps up and says that even though Randy Orton attacked his tag team partner two weeks ago, and instead of being suspended for his actions, Orton was made captain of a Survivor Series team that Rhodes now has to serve on. Stephanie says that she's aware of Orton's activities, and tonight he will pay for one of them... he will face CM Punk tonight... in a 30-man lumberjack match! Orton takes a mic and says that this will ensure nothing but chaos, Stephanie says, "I respectfully disagree. NEXT QUESTION."
Santino Marella takes the mic says he notices a rapper (sorry, I didn't catch who!) and says he's going to ask his question as a rap song! "I'm Santino Marella, I come from Europe. I like my pancakes with maple syrup! I lost my title to William Regal with a knee to the head that should be illegal!" ROTFLAMO! This is great! Basically Marella asks for a title rematch against William Regal.
John "Bradshaw" Layfield started to ask a question about Vince McMahon's return, Stephanie tells him that her and Shane are running the show for right now, access to Mr. McMahon is out of the question. Shawn Michaels then snatches the mic and asks Stephanie if he can clear away a six-day ban on retribution on JBL for hitting him in the face last week by making a match tonight. Stephanie says no dice, so Shawn says he understands, and he'll take responsibility for what happens next, which results in him pummelling JBL in the ring, everybody clears out to give them room, but JBL escapes, we go to commercial.
Kelly Kelly vs. Victoria
I have to admit, now that Kelly Kelly has gotten rid of the chaps, she actually LOOKS a lot more like a respectable women's wrestler. At Survivor Series it's going to be a Raw vs. SmackDown Diva's match, with both women's champions head up as team captains. Tonight Victoria is visiting from SmackDown to help highlight this match.
Victoria kicks Kelly in the guts, whips her off the ropes, and eats a headscissor takeover and a dropkick from Kelly for her troubles. Kelly with a cartwheel elbow into the corner, connecting with Victoria, but Victoria responds with a stiff clothesline. Victoria with a backbreaker over the knee on Kelly, throws her down, grabs some hair and sets up for an Argentine Backbreaker into the Arachnophobia backbreaker drop, cover and a two count. Victoria tries for a hip toss out of the corner, but Kelly rolls through, rolls up Victoria from behind and gets the pinfall!
WINNER: Kelly Kelly. Kelly Kelly rolls out of the ring to celebrate her win, but Victoria chases her down, throws her back in the ring and nails her with the Widow's Peak. Mickie James, Candice Michelle and Jillian Hall all run down to ringside to chase her off and protect Kelly Kelly, Victoria escapes out of the ring, only to get Pearl Harbored from behind by WWE Women's Champion Beth Phoenix! Phoenix rolls Victoria inside, takes a Mick Kick from James, gets whipped off the ropes and takes a double-team armdrag from Michelle and Hall, before Victoria goes Down in Flames thanks to Phoenix! Wow, you know, I didn't have a single damn thing to bitch about in this match, Kelly actually hit all her spots and didn't botch anything!
We take a break after watching Batista make his way backstage towards the ring. This week's WWE Rewind was Dave Batista defeating Cody Rhodes after he steps up to take Randy Orton's place in an effort to prove himself. Yeah, big mistake Codester!
Dave Batista vs. Manu (w/ Cody Rhodes)
Manu apparently wants a piece of Batista next, Randy Orton shows up as well to watch from ringisde. We get a lockup, breakup, lockup, Manu throws Batista into the ropes, Batista ducks a clothesline but catches a chop to the throat from Manu, followed by a headbutt and throw into the corner. Manu whips Batista out, ducks down, Batista kicks him in the face, kicks him in the chest, goes for the Batista bomb, but Manu reverses him into a Samoan Drop. Manu with a nice leg lariat and a cover for two.
Manu with a stomp into Batista's head, then picks up the Animal and throws him shoulder-first into the steel ringpost, snap mare takeover then a vice grip on the trapezius. Batista winches in pain as Randy Orton stares on from the top of the ramp. Batista struggles to his feet, breaks the hold by running into the corner and nailing Manu with a drop toehold. He tries to whip Manu out of the corner, but Manu puts the brakes on, reverss it and splashes Batista in the corner. Cover and a two count. Cody Rhodes is looking on as Manu delivers a diving headbutt off the ropes, covers and hooks the leg, two count.
Manu sets up for a clothesline, charges, Batista sees it and responds with a kick into the jaw, a cothesline and a spear. Batista grabs the hair, sets up for the Batista Bomb but takes a backdrop from Manu instead. Manu goes for a running clothesline, Batista with a running spear, and now he finally connects with the Batista Bomb, 1-2-3 we're done!
WINNER: Dave Batista. Orton stares on coldly from the top of the stage as Batista spots him and stares him down. Batista climbs the turnbuckle to pose, then looks down to Cody Rhodes, challenges him to step in the ring. Orton steps up on the apron, looks back to Orton for some reason, steps onto the apron a bit more, looks back again, then wisely jumps down, collects Manu and walks back up the ramp towards Orton.
Batista takes the mic, "Orton, for three years I've had to listen to you run your mouth, badmouth me, badmouth Evolution. And for three years I've wanted to whoop your ass! This Sunday, Sunday, I finally get to do it! So you need to stopy worrying about John Cena coming back, and stop whining and worrying about who is next in line, and start worrying about what I'm going to do to you at Survivor Series!"
We take a commercial break after recapping a few of the match highlights. Later tonight, Cryme Tyme will take on the odd-couple pairing of the borthers of the "Clothesline from Hell", John "Bradshaw" Layfield and Kane!
Stephanie McMahon is out on stage as we return to television and she introduces to us and the fans, WWE Hall of Fame member Chief Jay Strongbow! Backstage Randy Orton approaches Cody Rhodes and chides him for not attacking Dave Batista, and if Rhodes is going to keep being a pussy, he's going to tell Steph-Bear to kick Rhodes off of his team. Rhodes comments that Orton didn't go down to the ring either. Orton says that he is saving himself for his Lumberjack Match against CM Punk, ensuring that Punk has no place to hide and will not be ready for Survivor Series on Sunday. Rhodes responds, "Keep talking, Randy... right now it's all you're good at!"
We then go back out to the arena were ECW announcer Todd Grisham introduces us to a video package for Evan Bourne, showing the injury that that he suffered a few weeks ago. We then have Evan Bourne come out, Grisham asks him how his ankle is healing, Bourne starts to talk about it, and that big ugly goof Mike Knox comes out, confronts Bourne without saying a word, and the two men stare down. Bourne finally mouths, "What do you WANT?", and Knox walks off.
We switch backstage as Rey Mysterio is walking to the ring for his match, Shawn Michaels joins him then shouts out, "Stop the music! Stop the music!" Mysterio asks him what's wrong, Michaels says, "You know, I've made this walk many times over the years... Marty Janetty, Triple H... even Hulk Hogan. This is the first time I've ever done it with you... I'm a little nervous!" Mysterio squints at him and says, "Seriously?" Michaels nods his head, Mysterios says, "Well, let's just take this one step at a time then." And the two of them literally take one step at a time walking down the hall.
Dolph Ziggler enters the picture, starts his speil, Michaels cuts him off, "Hey! You're Dolph Ziggler!" Ziggler nods his head, Michaels continues, "Well I'm Shawn Michaels, and this is Rey Mysterio. And guess what? This is our first match together! Tonight! Right here on Raw! Survivor Series preview! Don't miss it!" And they continue walking down the hall. Off to break.
"the Shaman of Sexy" John Morrison & Mike "the Miz" Mizain vs. "the Heart Break Kid" Shawn Michaels & Rey Mysterio, Jr.
After a half hour of introductions, we finally start with Michaels and Morrison locking up, Michaels with a side headlock, Morrison with a shove off the ropes, Michaels with the shoulder tackle, tag into Mysterio, drop toehold on Morrison, Mysterio with a low dropkick to the head, cover, two count. Morrison whips Mysterio off the ropes, ducks down, Mysterio with a kick in the face into the headscissor takeover. Mysterio tries for the 6-1-9 but Mizain trips him, Michaels runs in and takes out Mizain, Morrison runs over, Mysterio takes him out with the suicide dive and we go to commercial.
Back from the break, Mizain delivers a knee to Michaels' guts then body slams him, tries for a springboard legdrop off the corner and misses bigtime as Michaels moves out of the way and tags in Mysterio. Mysterio with the sit-out splash off the top rope, headscissor takevoer, whips Mizain into the ropes, Mizain holds on, Mysterio charges and gets backdropped over the ropes to the apron, Mysterio delivers a shoulder to Mizain's midsection, fights off an attack from Morrison from the outside, but gets snatched arm-first by Mizain and whipped into the ringpost. Morrison tags in and gets a pin attempt, tags back in Mizain who applies a surfboard-type submission. Mysterio kicks Mizain in the head, Mizain bounces off the ropes, Sunset Flip on Mysterio, but Mysterio rolls through the pin attempt and catches Mizain with a low dropkick. Mizain tags in Morrison, who stops Mysterio from making a tag.
Morrison whips Mysterio into the corner chest-first, goes for a pin attempt afterwards. Morrison wraps up Mysterio into an Abdominal Stretch, Mysterio gets a leg loose and knees Morrison in the head twice, bounces off the ropes, tries to slide under the legs to make a tag, but Morrison catches the leg, kick to the midsection, Tilt-a-Whirl Gutbuster, cover and a two count. Morrison tags in Mizain, hems up Mysterio and Mizain kicks Mysterio in the midsection, then rakes the eyes with his boot several times, kick to the head, legdrop and a cover for two. Mizain with a front face lock, tags in Morrison, exposes the ribs and Morrison gets off a kick into Mysterio's ribs. Mizain uses the rope to wrap Mysterio's head around it and choke him. Morrison whips Mysterio chest-first into the corner again, tries for the dropckick off the springboard from the ropes, but Mysterop counters with a dropkick to the chest.
Both men make their respective hot tags, and Michaels takes down Mizain with a pair of clotheslines and a shoulder block, a kip-up, atomic drop, body slam and Michaels is going for the top-rope elbow drop... DELIVERED! Vintage Shawn Michaels! Michaels fires up the crowd by calling for the Superkick, goes for it, Mizain ducks it but Michaels immediately going into the Figure Four Leglock. Mizain gets out of it, whips MIchaels into the corner, Michaels flips himself out of the corner, catches John Morrison with a forearm as he tries to step in, all hell breaks loose. Mysterio gets in and hits Mizain with a monkey flip, 6-1-9 on Mizain, Mizain stumbles around and stumbles into Michaels' Sweet Chin Music, but as the referee is trying to get Mysterio out of the ring, Morrison slides in and nails Michaels with his own Superkick! He throws Mizain on top and skeedaddles as the referee turns around and picks up the cheapshot win!
WINNERS: John Morrison & Mike Mizain. We go for the lighlights of the end of the match. We then go to ringside as Michael Cole shills Universals' "Green Week" (USA Network is owned by General Electric, which owns Universal, which owns NBC, which owns USA and other cable networks). Cole says he helps the environment by using resuable shopping bags. Jerry "the King" Lawler says that he helps the environment by following his girlfriend around and turns off all the lights she flips on in the house. "Plus you have more fun with your girl in the dark!" King's always got the dirty old man angle on anything. All of this segues into another John Cena promo, this time with Cena himself as he is walking around Boston, the home of Sunday's Survivor Series PPV.
Backstage we have WWE World Heavyweight Champion Chris Jericho watching the monitors. Stephanie McMahon walks up and asks if he's ready, since he demanded "equal time" on television. Jericho asks McMahon if she is enjoying her self, and she gets a puzzled look on her face. Jericho says that she knows that when Cena returns he is going to cause nothing but trouble and chaos. And after this Sunday, Jericho is still going to be the champion, whether her, Shane or anybody else likes it. Off to commercial.
We go backstage with Todd Grisham and an interview with CM Punk. Grisham reminds Punk and the fans that he and Kofi Kingston were attacked by Priceless and Randy Orton two months ago at the WWE Unforgiven PPV, costing Punk his WWE World Heavyweight Champion. Punk says he isn't sure why Orton attacked him, other than to prove that he was still relevent while he was injured. Punk says that Stephanie made this a Lumberjack Match to ensure that the action stays in the ring, he isn't going anywhere and now he knows that Orton won't be going anywhere either. Punk then shoots on all of Evolution by saying he has no privilidge in this business by having a Hall of Fame father or being mentored by legends like Ric Flair or Triple H, he had to work hard for everything and will defend this tonight.
We go to the locker room where Kane approaches John Layfield and sarcastically asks if the "captain" has any advice. JBL waxes on about how they're actually very compatible, Kane responds. "How are we compatible? Your hobby is giving financial advice. My hobby is finding victims and electrocuting their genitals with car batteries!" Kane tells JBL that he doesn't take advice and if JBL gets in his way, he'll stomp on him.
Cryme Tyme (Shad Gespard & JTG) vs. Kane & John "Bradshaw" Layfield
Cryme Tyme is introduced just before we go to commercial. JBL and Kane get their separate introductions as we come out of break. Layfield and JTG lock up at the start, JTG whips Layfield into the corner, Gespard tags in and gets whipped into JBL in the corner. Gespard applies an armbar, Layfield punches out, but JTG punches him in the face tags in and whips himself into Layfield has he's whipped off the ropes, pin attempt. Gespard tags back in, shoulder tackle, cover for a two count. Gespard with an armbar, shoulder tackle into the arm, tags in JTG who leaps over Gespard's head and lands on the arm. JTG whips Layfield off the ropes, ducks down, Layfield clubs him in the back and tags in Kane.
Kane with a body slam and a low dropkick to the face. Kane headbutts JTG in the corner a few times, whips him to the other corner and nails him with a clothesline, followed by a side slam, followed by kicking Gespard in the head down to the floor. Kane climbs to the top turnbuckle and deivers the Clothesline from Hell, sets up for the Chokeslam, but JBL reaches in for the upraised hand and tags himself in. Layfield bounces off the ropes and nails JBL with his own version of the Clothesline from Hell, covers andpicks up the win.
WINNERS: John Layfield & Kane. Kane stares on at Layfield, clearly pissed off, Layfield wisely rolls out and takes off quckly. We go backstage where Kofi Kingston is talking to Evan Bourne, minding their own business, when Mike Knox attacks Kingston from behind, knees him in the guts a few times, throws him into a closed concession stand door. He then shoves Evan Bourne into a steel door, Bourne begs off, "Mike! Please! No!" as Knox picks up Bourne's crutch and bashes him in his ankle cast. Off to commercial.
WWE Intercontinental Champion William Regal (w/ Layla London) vs. ECW Champion Matt Hardy (non-title match)
Regal hits the ring and he's back to his old heel self, ripping on the fans for giving the rap star at ringside more respect than he gets. Matt Hardy enters and gets an even bigger pop. Champion vs. Champion as these two men square up against each other ahead of their Survivor Series tag team match this Sunday. William Regal starts out with a few armbars and go behinds, Hardy counters with a schoolboy for a pin, followed by a backslide. Regal whips Hardy to the outside, waits for him to get back in the ring and then hits him with a high knee to knock him off, Hardy then drags Regal outside as he steps on the apron, knocking him off. They then start brawling around the ring, slamming each other into barrier as the referee counts them out.
WINNER: Double Disqualification. Regal is pissed off and kicks Hardy into the chest, these two men start brawling again, several referees have to come out to break them up. Of course, this has nothing to do with Hardy's announcement over the weekend that he has a partially torn PCL in the back of his surgically-repaired knee. Off to commercial before we hit the main event!
WWE World Heavyweight Champion Chris Jericho is introduced before the main event, taking center ring with a mic in his hand. "For the past month we've been treated to the heartwarming story of John Cena, so tonight I'm going to treat you to a much more impressive story - my stroy - and it begins a full year and a half before John Cena even entered a WWE ring by accomplishing the unthinkable. I defeated one of the biggest star in this company's history, the Rock, to become the WCW Heavyweight Champion. I then made history twenty minutes later by defeating another of this company's great starts, Steve Austin, winning the WWF Championship and becoming the first-ever Undisputed WWF World Heavyweight Champion, unifying both titles." Jericho then goes on to details his other glories of his wrestling career. He reminds us that he took a beating from Shawn Michaels, and then turned around and won the WWE World Heavyweight Championship in a four-way steel cage match, he defeated CM Punk and Dave Batista in two more steel cage matches, he defeated Shawn Michaels in his own Ladder Match, and now reigns as a five-time WWE champion.
He says Cena has been treated as a savior and a conquering hero, but he's never beaten Jericho. Jericho says that the story always ends the same way when it comes to himself, no matter who the opponent, Jericho wins. "I am the best in the business today, I am at the top of my game, and I refuse to let John Cena come in and take away all that I have done. Contrary to what you have been told, the center of the universe is not John Cena, the center of the WWE Universe is the WWE World Heavyweight Championship and me, Chris Jericho." Jericho says that WWE will only be saved after he puts away Cena once and for all.
Lumberjack Match: "the Legend Killer" Randy Orton vs. WWE World Tag Team champion CM Punk (non-title match)
Orton gets to enter first, hits his trademark poses, and not only are the fans unimpressed, he isn't getting any support from any of the lumberjacks at ringside, not even the heels. Punk enters next, gets a pop from the crowd... but no support from the lumberjacks either, not even the babyfaces. We get a bell, the two men circle the ring a few times, finally get a collar-and-elbow tie-up, Orton puts Punk into the ropes, Punk turns it around in the corner, they finally break and try it again. Punk with a side headlocks switched into a go-behind into a drop toe hold into a side headlock on the mat, Orton reverses with an armbar on the mat, they jump up into a standoff again. They go to lock up again, Orton cuts Punk off with a boot to the midsection, throws Punk outside, and Punk rolls back in before anybody can get him. Orton looks over to the lumberjacks and hollars, "WHAT is your problem??"
Punk gets a reverse waistlock on Orton, Orton wiggles out, clubs Punk down to the mat, bounces off the ropes, Punk leaps up and kicks him in the face, sending Orton to the outside. Orton is quickly thrown back in, Punk with a schoolboy for a pin attempt, followed by a backslide for a pin attempt. Punk throws orton outside again, Orton with a cheap shot on Jamie Noble, which leads to a beatdown from the babyfaces, lead by Dave Batista, before being thrown back in. Punk throws Orton into the corner, lays in some punches, tries for a high knee to the head but Orton side steps it. Mark Henry reaches through the ropes and pulls Punk out, the heel lumberjacks beat him down, throws in Punk, Orton covers, kick out. Orton covers again, kickout.
Orton takes his time to measure out punches and stomps on Punk, while Jerry Lawler explains to us all the origins of the Lumberjack Match. Punk gets to his feet and fires off a few punches to Orton's head, bounces off the ropes, Orton with a textbook standing dropkick to Punk's head, covers for a two count. Orton takes his time to measure out a few kneedrops to the head, rolls Punk over for a pin attempt. Orton applies a side headlock on the mat to Punk's head. Punk gets to his feet, throws a few elbows into the guts, Orton offers up a European Uppercut instead, whips Punk into the corner and charges, Punk catches him with a knee to the face, bounces off the ropes, Orton snaps off a scoop slam, cover and a two count.
Orton again takes his time to measure out a kneedrop to the back of Punk's head before re-applying the side headlock on the mat. Punk gets to his feet, clubs Orton in the back of the head, Orton tries to whip him into the corner but Punk counters with a spinning neckbreaker. Both men are down, struggle to their feet and start trading forearm shots. Punk gets the upper hand, boot to the midsection, slaps, paintbrushes and the kick to the back of the head, Orton goes down, Punk covers 1... 2... kickout! Very close pinfall! Punk whips Orton off the ropes and nails him with a leg lariat, followed by a kneelift in the corner and his patented running bulldog out of the corner, Punk covers, hooks the leg, and Orton BARELY kicks out before three. Orton straggles up into the corner, comes out, PUnk snatches him up and tries for the GTS, Orton wiggles out and nails him with a side backbreaker.
Orton tries to set up for the RKO as Punk gets to his feet, tries for it and Punk counters with a dropkick that sends Orton out into the Lumberjacks, into the heel section, the babyfaces come over to try to beat on Orton, and Punk decides to dive on them all from the top turnbuckle! Punk gets back into the ring and parties. William Regal swipes at Punk's feet to distract him, long enough for Randy Orton to slide in and catch Punk off-guard with an RKO, 1-2-3.
WINNER: Randy Orton. And odd sort of win. Orton sets up to kick Punk's head off of his shoulders. Dave Batista shouts out "NO! NO! NO!", slides in the ring, knocks aside the goofy referee who was in the way and then spears Orton as he makes his run. This gets everybody in the ring, all hell breaks loose as we end the night!