| Date: 12/29 | 8:00 PM |
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Killa Kev & The Angry Marks present The Last WWE Raw Recap of 2008
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Rey Mysterio is in the ring and he's a LITTLE ticked off that Shawn Michaels came in and appeared to save his new boss, John Layfield, only to strike him and thus cause JBL to pick up a DQ win to continue on in the "Race to the Rumble" tournament. Mysterio says that he respects Michaels, but they have to talk. NOW.
Shawn Michaels' music hits, he comes down to the ring. "Shawn," says Mysterio, "I know... I know my heart. Despite your affiliation with JBL, you're a great person. I'm not here to ask you for your spot in the 'Race to the Rumble' match. In fact, what I really want is for you to be honorable and to face me one-on-one, here, tonight." The fans cheer for this idea. Michaels looks down into the mat. "I just want my opportunity back. If you accept, the winner will move on to the Fatal Four-Way at the end of the night. What do you say, Shawn? All I'm doin' is asking you to do the right thing."
Michaels looks down at the mat again, looks into Mysterio's eyes, and says, "I accept." They shake hands. "Thank you," says Mysterio. John Layfield comes out... "Actually, Ray..." the fans boo Layfield heavily. "Shawn's answer is 'No'. Shawn Michaels is my employee, and any decision that relates to Shawn Michaels goes through me. I appreciate the offer, Ray, but the only match that Michaels will be participating in tonight will be the Fatal Four-Way match, which I, too, will be competing in. Shawn... I would appreciate if you would leave the ring. Now.
The fans boo even harder, Michaels looks around, looks at Mysterio, looks down at the mat again, then steps out of the ring. The fans start chanting "H-B-K! H-B-K!", then elicit more boos as he steps out. Mysterio pleads, "Shawn! Please, Shawn! Are you just gonna walk back? Are you just going to listen to what Bradshaw tells you? You gonna do everything he says? Shawn, you know that all the money in the world can't make up for selling your soul! Sha..."
Mysteiro's words are cut off as Mike Knox ambushes Rey Mysterio from behind, coming through the crowd. Layfield orders Michaels to the back and they walk off. Knox picks up Mysterio in a half nelson, wrings him around like a rag doll, then throws him down. Knox picks Mysterio back up by his neck, then throws him down as WWE World Heavyweight Champion John Cena hits the ring and clotheslines Knox over the top rope. Cena holds the center of the ring after quickly checking on Mysterio, Knox looks around, clears the cobwebs from his head then exits back through the crowd. Cena tells him to get his sorry ass lost. Mysterio gets to his feet, hugs Cena, we go to commercial.
Backstage, Randy Orton is with Cody Rhodes, Manu and Sim Snuka. He says that the Legacy could be bigger than any stable in professional wrestling history, but that they're going to have to prove it... or else some people are going to have to go! He tells Rhodes that he's heading out to the ring first.
Cody Rhodes vs. C.M. Punk
Rhodes gets to prove himself against the #1 Contender for the WWE Intercontinental Championship. Punk gets up on the turnbuckles and taunts Rhodes, telling him he's about to be kicked out. But before anything happens, WWE Intercontinental Champion William Regal & his ladyfriend Layla London make their way down to the ring. And next Monday night, it will be Regal and Punk locking horns over that title. Regal & London go down to the announcing table to watch.
Bell rings, lockup, Rhodes with a quick rollup, kickout by Punk who gets to his feet and applies a side headlock, Rhodes shoots him off but eats a shoulder block, Punk off the ropes, Rhodes trips him, pin attempt, Punk back with a side headlock on the mat, Rhodes rolls him over for a pin attempt, Punk scrambles to his feet, headlock applied, snap mare, a pair of kicks to the back and Punk goes for his own pin attempt. Rhodes with a double leg takedown, jackknife's over into a pin attempt. Rhodes is shot off the ropes, takes a dropkick from Punk, cover and a two count and both men take a Mexican standoff.
Punk kicks Rhodes in the midsection, tries for a DDT, Rhodes grabs the ropes and then tries to cover Punk a few times, Punk quickly kicks out. Punk sits up shaking off his left arm. Rhodes with a body slam, pulls down his right kneepad and hits a rolling kneedrop in the face, quickly covers and hooks the leg, two count for Rhodes. Rhodes goes for a full nelson on the mat and locks it in deep. Fans start cheering for Punk, Punk powers his way to his feet, a few stiff reverse elbows to the jaw to break the hold, kicks Rhodes in the chest to knock him to the mat. Punk takes a quick breather, goes up to the top turnbuckle, cross body block, Rhodes catches him, rolls through, hooks the leg and Punk barely kicks out, Punk gets to his feet, a few forearm shivers, whips Rhodes to the ropes, Rhodes reverses and charges, Punk lifts him over the top ropes knocks Rhodes off the apron then nails Rhodes with a suicide dive through the ropes, both men's head collide into the announcer's table.
Eventually they get to their feet and they trade punches and kicks, Punk with a spinning heel kick and a running knee lift. Punk spins around and confronts William Regal, completely forgetting that the referee was counting them out! Rhodes recovers, realizes what's up and quickly scrambles into the ring. Punk turns around and tries to dart into the ring but TOO LATE!
WINNER: Cody Rhodes, by countout. Punk is really pissed off, he gets back in the ring and attacks Rhodes from behind, but William Regal flies in and nails Punk in the temple with a high knee of his own, blindsiding him. Regal talks some smack, steps out of the ring and Layla London brings him his title and a kiss.
Backstage John Cena is in Stephanie McMahon's office, and apparently he isn't too happy that she wants him to do color commentary for the Fatal Four-Way match, and decides to imitate a sports announcer. Cena says he's fired up and he wants to end 2008 with a bang, he doesn't care who he faces or what he has to do, he just wants to DO IT! He tells Steph that she knows what the fans want, if she'll listen to them.
We come back with Dustin "Goldust" Runnels giving out his Christmas wishes for some WWE superstars. Sorry, I was taking a piss so I missed most of it. Back to Michael Cole & Jerry Lawler, we go back two weeks as Randy Orton knocks out Batista with a kick to the temple. Cole says that he suffered a concussion and a bone graft to repair two broken teeth... and JUST so happens that Batista also got surgery for the torn hamstring he suffered two months ago. For FUCKS SAKE why can't they just say that instead of making up the crap about the concussion and the fake broken teeth? Apparently Batista partially tore the hamstring in the same match that John Cena injured his neck - back at Summer Slam! We go to an interview with Batista and the doctor who did the hamstring repair surgery.
Six Diva Battle Royal for #1 Contender for the WWE Women's Championship:
Kelly Kelly vs. Melina Perez vs. Mickie James vs. Candice Michelle vs. Jillian Hall vs. Katie Lea Burchill
Kelly, Perez & James are all introduced before a commercial break, back on TV Hall, Michelle & Burchill are already in the ring as Santino Marella is introducing the WWE Women's Champion, Beth Phoenix.
The bell rings and everybody pairs off, Candice Michelle dropkicks Hall out of the ring, but she holds on to the ropes as Burchill throws Michelle over the top, then they double-team Mickie James with a clothesline. Kelly Kelly with a Thesz Press on Hall, then runs over and tries to help Perez to eliminate Katie Lea Burchill. Hall recovers and eliminates Kelly, then hits a facebuster on Perez. Burchill and Jillian double team on Perez, try to dump her over, then James dumps both Hall and Burchill over the top.
It's James and Perez one-on-one, and HOO BOY this could get stiff quick! James with an armbar on Perez, Perez reverses and applies a side headlock, James shoots her off, ducks then a leapfrog, Perez rolls through it and we get a Mexican standoff. James shoots at Perez, puts her in the corner, Perez kicks her off, charges into a lockup, whps James off the ropes, reverse, reverse again, reverse again, James charges Perz, Perez tries to drop her over the top, James holds onto the ropes, tries to shoulderblock her way in, but Perez with a NICE spinkick into the ribs that sends James sailing off the apron.
WINNER: Melina Perez. Beth Phoenix immediately gets in the ring, holds up the title to glat, then slaps Perez in the face, beats her up and throws her out of the ring. The second Phoenix steps down to the floor Perez jumps on her and they start brawling. Rosa, Phoenix's superfan, jumps over the ring barrier and gets involved, security drags her out, Marella gets really concerned for Phoenix.
Backstage Todd Grisham is backstage with Chris Jericho, who is upset that WWE Magazine named him "Jerk of the Y ear". Jericho again rambles off about all of his accomplishments and asks if that is what makes him a jerk. He tells the fans, "If you want to see the 'Jerk of the Year', I suggest you look in a mirror." Commercial.
Sim Snuka vs. "Super Haas" Jimmy Snuka
Yeah, Charlie Haas is imitating Sim Snuka's father, the legendary "Superfly" Jimmy Snuka. Snuka is clearly upset by this and attacks Haas from behind as soon as the bell rings, whipping him around, getting a quick pinfall, then straddling Hass' head, dropping him face-first into the mat, cover and a two count. Snuka chokes Haas over the middle rope, ref breaks. Haas gets to his feet and breaks out all of Jimmy Snuka's old moves to try to get the upper hand, but Snuka fires back with a flying knee to the face, cover and a two count.
Snuka applies a reverse chinlock in the middle of the ring, Haas gets to his feet, punches his way out, whips Snuka, Snuka stops it and hits a short reverse elbow to the face, cover, one count and Snuka lays in some more punches to the face. Snuka clubs Haas in the back, snapmare followed by a kneedrop into the face. Snuka wraps up Haas in a wear-down maneuver, wedging Haas' head between his knee and elbow. Haas powers up as the fans cheer him on, punches out of the hold, but Snuka clubs him in the back again. Snuka tries to slam haas' head into the turnbuckle, Haas blocks it and returns the favor, shoots Snuka off the ropes, two Superfly-style leapfrogs over him, then a flying forearm into a cover, two count.
Haas pulls up Snuka, Snuka gives him a knee to the gut, bounces off the ropes, Haas catches him and slams him to the mat. Haas fires up, puts his Superfly wig back on, goes to the top turnbuckle... for the Superfly Splash?? YES! He's going for it he flies! Snuka puts the knees up! Snuka then cracks Haas in the back of the head with a kick, cover, 1-2-3 it's done.
WINNER: Sim Snuka. Snuka is excited that he got the win, steps out of the ring and leaves. Jerry Lawler tries to be witty and says, "I see the resemblence of Superfly in Sim's face..." even though Sim Snuka is the ADOPTED SON of Jimmy Snuka. Commercial.
John Cena, Rey Mysterio, Kofi Kingston & Cryme Tyme (Shad Gaspard & JTG) vs. Mike Knox, Kane, Dolph Ziggler & the WWE World Tag Team Champions John Morrison & Mike "the Miz" Mizanin
Mysterio wants Knox, Cena wants a big match, so apparently Stephanie McMahon gave them both in this clusterfuck of a 10-man tag team. How is it that of all the minorities on this team, John Cena is the blackest? That, my friends, is the $64,000 question.
We're gonna start off with Ziggler and JTG, Ziggler shoves JTG then wants a handshake, JTG shoves him back, throws him around a little, cover and a one count. JTG drives Ziggler into the corner, Gespard tags in and then whips JTG into Ziggler with a Superman Punch. Gaspard throws Ziggler into the buckle hard a few times charges, Ziggler moves out of the way and tags in Morrison, who eats a STIFF clothesline from Gaspard. Gaspard with an armbar, tags in Kofi Kingston, who leapfrogs in with a legdrop on Morrison's arm, cover, two count. Morrison recovers, whps Kingston off the ropes, Kignston with an armdrag, a dropkick, a high clothesline, then all the sudden everybody gets in the ring and stands off as we go to commercial.
Back from break, we see during the break that Kingston misses the cross-body block off the corner on Morrison, which leads us into Mizanin holding Kingston down with a side headlock. Kingston gets to his feet, tries to punch his way out, Mizanin with a handful of hair drags him down. Kingston grabs him by the head with his legs, makes a tag to Rey Mysterio, who kicks Mizanin in the head followed by the headscissor takeover, a flying forearm to the face. Mysterio with the flying headscissors off the top turnbuckle, runs over and punches Mike Knox in the face, covers Mizanin for the two count. Mizanin tries to whip Mysterio off the ropes, but Mysterio reverses, tries for a huracanrana, but Mizanin catches him and then brings him over to Kane who punches him in the face.
Kane tags in, side slam on Mysterio, tags in Mike Knox who puts a knee in Mysterio's face. Knox whips Mysterio into a corner, charges and hits a splash, another whip to a corner, another charge and another splash. Knox tags in Ziggler who kicks Mysterio in the ribs, then the face, then grinds his boot into the back of Mysterio's head before applying a reverse chinlock. Ziggler cinches it in deep as the fans try to rally Mysterio back with claps and cheers. Mysterio sits up, gets to his feet, elbows out, Ziggler goes for a belly-to-back suplex, Mysterio flips out, Ziggler turns around and clotheslines him. Ziggler tags in Morrison, holds Mysterio down as Morrison stomps him in the ribs, then lays in some heavy rights from the top mount. Morrison pulls up Mysterio and nails him with the big European uppercut, puts Mysterio on the top turnbuckle backwards, then tries for a belly-to-back suplex off the top turnbuckle. Mystero blocks it, punches him off, turns around and sets up for a huracanrana off the back and nails it!
Both men are down, Morrison makes a tag to Mike Knox, Mysterio tags in Cena, who rushes over, knocks Kane off the apron, attacks Knox, whips off the ropes, reversal by Knox, Cena with a pair of shoulderblocks, some bodies fly into the ring, Kane gets in and tries to chokeslam Cena, Kingston leapfrogs in and dropkicks Kane. Knox tries to take out Cena and he eats a sidewalk slam, Ziggler gets in and eats one too. Kingston and Cena get big grins on their faces. Kingston hits the hig legdrop on Ziggler, Cena hits the Five Knuckle Shuffle on Knox. Kingston takes Ziggler out of the ring with a dropkick, Cena with the F-U on Knox. Mysterio wants tagged in, he gets it, and Mysterio hits the frog splash off the top turnbuckle onto Knox for the win!
WINNER: Team Chain Gang 2.0. Hell, I don't know what to call 'em. We recap the highlights of the end of the match. Wee. Backstage Todd Grisham walks into Shawn Michaels' locker room for an interview, asks Michaels if his business relationship with Layfield is going to play a part of the Fatal Four Way tonight. Michaels responds, "I'm Mister WrestleMania, and there's only one thing I'm concerned about, and that's stealing the show." Break.
Backstage Kelly Kelly is bitching out her secret lover... "Please! I've tried to protect you from Kane!" Camera pans around... it's Randy Orton! He scoffs and says that it was one night only, he used her, and that right now with the WWE World Heavyweight Championship on the line, he doesn't need a distraction like her! He walks off.
Manu vs. ECW Champion Matt Hardy (non-title match)
Christ, they just WILL NOT let Matt Hardy rest, will they? He's still injured, but he's on Raw tonight, he'll be at tomorrow's ECW AND he'll be in a tag-team match on SmackDown this Friday with Jeff. christ.
We start out with Hardy applying an armbar on Manu, Manu reverses it then transitions into a side headlock. Hardy punches out, shoves Manu off into the ropes but eats a shouldertackle and takes a pin attempt from him before Manu re-applies the headlock. Hardy again punches out, shoots him off the ropes, ducks down, Manu tries for a armdrag, Hardy blocks it, Manu punches him in the stomach, cover, body slam, another cover, snap mare into a sleeper. Hardy gets to his feet, elbows out again, turns around, punches Manu in the head a few times, ducks a clothesline, a few more jabs. Manu shoots him into the ropes, Hardy holds on, Manu charges, Hardy drops him over the top then hits a baseball slide. Both men on the outside, Hardy throws Manu back in the ring, slides in, elbow drop to the chin, a second one to the chest, cover and a two count.
Hardy pulls Manu up, his a modified neckbreaker, cover, two count. Hardy picks Manu up, who punches him in the face then flapjacks Hardy neck-first into the top rope, cover and a two count. Manu stomps on Hardy's back a few times, pulls him up by the hair, headbutt. Manu bounces off the ropes and hits a diving headbutt into the shoulder, cover and a hook of the leg, two count. Manu waits for Hardy to get up, applies a sleeper again. Fans weakly cheer for Hardy as he tries to fight it and goes down. Manu breaks it and hits a diving headbutt to the back of the head, rolls Hardy over for a two count, Manu hooks both legs and tries it again, two count.
Manu picks up Hardy and drops him with a body slam, then springboards off the corner with a moonsault, Hardy rolls into the corner and Manu eats the mat! Both men taking a quick breather, Hardy gets to his feet first, lays in some punches bounces off the ropes and connects with a clothesline, off the ropes again and connects with a forearm shiver, covers Manu for a two count. Hardy pulls Manu up, slugs him a few times, hits the Side Effec,t 1... 2... kickout. Hardy pulls Manu up, Manu shoves him off, tries for a clothesline, Hardy ducks it but Manu hits him with an elbow to the back of the head, covers, two count. Hardy tries for the Twist of Fate, Manu blocks it, throws Hardy into the corner, charges, Hardy with a boot up, tries for an axehandle smash off the top turnbuckle, Manu punches him in the face, then hits a swinging neckbreaker, cover and a two count.
Manu waits for Hardy to get to his feet, charges, Hardy with a drop toehold sends Manu head-first into the turnbuckle, Hardy tries for a bulldog out of the corner, Manu shoves him off, clotheslines him off the ropes, cover and a two count. Both men stagger to their feet, Manu whips Hardy into the corner, charges with a splash and connects. Manu pulls Hardy up, whips him to the opposite corner hard, charges again and connects with the splash a second time. Manu puts Hardy up on his shoulders, Hardy holds onto the ropes, uses the leverage and nails Manu with the Twist of Fate, covers... 1... 2... 3!
WINNER: Matt Hardy. Manu loses... is he out of the Legacy now? He sits up and then slams his hands on the mat, he's NOT happy with this loss! Matt Hardy takes his ECW Championship and steps out of the ring, walks backwards up the ramp to celebrate his win. We show the end of the match again on the RawHDTron.
We take a commercial break, come back with a short commercial for the new "Behind Enemy Lines" DVD, then start the introductions for the main event.
"Race to the Rumble" Fatal Four-Way Elimination Match to determine the #1 Contender to the WWE Championship: John Layfield vs. Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Jericho vs. Randy Orton
We drag out the introductions for nearly seven minutes before the bell rings, everybody squares off in the middle of the ring. Jericho and HBK decide to start it off, Jericho tries for a cheap roll-up from behind on Michaels, but Michaels catches him in his own small package. Jericho with a whip off the ropes and an armdrag, Michaels kicks him off, they trade a few more armdrags and Jericho is sent out of the ring as we go to break.
We come back and Orton and Jericho are squaring off in the ring, Orton with a side headlock, Jericho whips him off the ropes, Orton nails him witha shoulder tackle, bounces off the ropes, Jericho with a dropkick on his jaw, cover and a two count. Jericho lays in punches and puts Orton in the corner, pulls him out then kicks him in the ribs, puts him in the corner, Orton fights back, but Jericho whips him out, Orton reverses and connects with a clothesline, Jericho charges out and Orton catches him with a scoop slam, cover, two count. Orton stomps on Jericho's head, rolls him over and nails him with a forearm to the back of the head. Jericho immediatley trips him, tries for the Walls of Jericho, Orton uses his leg strength to completely flip him over, but Orton ends up on the outside of the apron. Jericho springboards off the middle turnbuckle to nail Orton with a dropkick, sending him to the floor.
Referee starts a count on Orton as Jericho celebrates. Orton climbs up the ropes, Jericho is there to meet him, tries to suplex him back in the ring but Orton slides over the top then nails him with a clothesline, then tags in Michaels. Michaels puts Jericho in the corner, chop, another corner, chop, third corner, chop, but Jericho whips Michaels out of the corner and into the other, Michaels goes in hard and flips upside-down. Jericho runs over to kick Michaels in the head a few times, sets him up on the top turnbuckle and then climbs up for the Superplex. Michaels fights him off, Jericho appears to get the upper-hand, Michaels fires off shots into the ribs, then a headbutt sends Jericho sailing to the mat. Michaels stands up and delivers the flying elbow!
Michaels tunes up the band for the superkick, but Layfield tags himself in tries to hit Jericho with the Clothesline from Hell, Jericho ducks it and hits Layfield with the Codebreaker, covers, and Michaels runs in to interrupt the pin. Jericho tries for the cross body block, Layfield catches him, staggers backwards, Michaels tags himself in, pulls Jericho off and superkicks him, covers, 1-2-3. Chris Jericho is eliminated.
Layfield ended up on the outside and apparently isn't very happy about what just happened. Orton steps into the ring as we take another commercial break, back and we got Layfield trying to put Orton into a sleeper hold, Orton fighting it but falling to his knees, flailing his arms. Orton pops back up to his feet, pulls off a belly-to-back suplex to break the hold. Orton bounces off the ropes... right into a boot from Layfield, who covers, hooks the leg and gets a two count. Layfield pulls Orton up, clubs him in the back, kicks him in the back, pulls him up by his head. The fans actually start chanting "R-K-O! R-K-O!" Layfield puts Orton into the corner, chokes him, then stomps him down to the mat. Layfield pulls Orton to his feet, only to take him out with a short-arm clothesline, cover and a hook of the leg, two count.
Layfield stomps on Orton's left hand, then on his right, then tags h im in the eye about a half dozen times before the referee backs him up. Layfield demands the referee give a standing 10-count. Orton weakly pulls himself up by the ropes, Layfield comes over and puts him in the corner, whips him to the opposite corner, charges, Orton puts up a boot, then fires away with rights, an European uppercut, puts Layfield in the corner and gives his own beatdown until the referee pulls him off. Layfield launches himself out of the corner with a forearm to the face, covers Orton and gets a two-and-a-half count. Layfield pulls up Orton and measures out a right, then a second and a third, and a forth. Orton is shot off the ropes, reverses and ducks down, Layfield clubs him in the back. Layfield bounces off the ropes and Orton meets him with a dropkick. Orton then returns the favor and delivers the Orton Stomp on Layfield, finishing it off with a stomp right in the breadbasket.
Fans are cheering Orton as he sets up for the punt, Layfield moves out of the way just in time to tag in Michaels. Michaels ducks a clothesline, tries for one of his own, Orton ducks it and catches Michaels with a backbreaker over the knee, covers and a two count. Orton pulls up Michaels and kicks him in the ribs a few times. Orton then lays in the Orton Stomp on Michaels' body. Orton spreads open Michaels' legs and stomps him in the chest three times. Orton backs off to take a breather, then drops to the mat to set up for the RKO. The fans are cheering for this as well, Michaels gets to his feet, Orton goes for it and Michaels is able to shove him off in mid-leap, both men down on the mat.
They get back up at the same time and trade right hands, Micheals then resorts to chops, whips Orton off the ropes, reversal, HBK with the flying forearm and the kip-up, the atomic drop, another right hand, body slam, Michaels goes to the top turnbuckle, goes for the elbow drop and connects! Michaels again goes for the superkick, Orton staggers to his feet, Michaels charges and connects, covers... 1... 2... 3. Randy Orton is eliminated.
Michaels instinctively goes for the superkick, but then pulls back as Layfield covers himself up quickly. The both stare each other in the eyes. Layfield orders Michaels to lay down on the mat and take the pin. Michaels gets that silly puppy-dog look in his eyes, and like a dominant master Layfield again orders him to lay down. Michaels tries to beg him not to be humiliated like this, Layfield isn't backing down. The fans are loudly chanting "H-B-K! H-B-K!" as Layfield points to the mat. Michaels slowly gets down on one knee, then stands back up, shaking his head.
You can see him mouthing, "Please, don't make me do this!" and Layfield mouthing back, "You will do what your told, I own you, I made you, you owe me! Do this for your family! Do this for your kids!" Michaels finally gets down on both knees, sits down on the mat, then lays down. Layfield walks over, Michaels sits up then gets back up on his feet. Layfield again orders him back down on the mat, you can see the tears starting to well up in Michaels' eyes. Michaels just closes his eyes and shouts "DO IT! DO IT! DO IT! C'MON! C'MON! DO IT! OH, GOD!". Layfield steps back and nails him with the Clothesline from Hell, covers him, hooks the leg and pins him.
WINNER, and #1 Contender for the WWE World Heavyweight Championship, John Layfield. Layfield is pissed off that he didn't get the win the easy way, he steps out of the ring and stomps off to the back. Michaels sits up, nearly in tears. Layfield stands at the top of the ramp and stares at Michaels, snears, but then takes a more somber face. We pan back to Michaels as he bursts into tears as we close out for the night.
And that's all for us tonight! Come back tomorrow as Stevie J covers the last ECW on Sci-Fi for 2008, followed by Big D & the Superfriends on Blog Talk Radio!